Monthly Archives: July 2017

Two Are Better Than One… Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Blameless True Friends 1

Two are better than One,

because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
    his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
    and has no one to help him u
p!

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hello Beautiful!  I hope you are having an amazing week realizing just how beautiful you are.  I pray you were able to rest in God’s grace and be cleansed by His lathering of love.  It’s amazing what refreshment does to a parched soul.  Living in peace blossoms the true beauty within.  It’s that time again, it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

God designed our lives for companionship, the need for others, not living in isolation and going at it alone.  Loneliness was never a part of God’s orchestration, instead He created the beauty found in intimacy with Him and one another.  We need each other!  Let’s challenge ourselves this week to be a true friend with childlike intentions.  Let’s share Blameless Blossoms True Beauty Withinour story with another Beloved the struggles we are feeling through the lens of Truth and Trust as we embrace this gift in what vulnerability offers while being raw and candid.  The healing that will come from this transparency will be liberating, but it will also bond you to the one you’re sharing with.

One thing I have learned by allowing my life to be completely exposed (and I’m talking about being totally naked here with nowhere to hide) through the transparency, rawness and complete vulnerability is we all struggle with insecurities, feelings of shame, defeat, fear, anxiety, depression, you name it!  We’re all imperfect beings living in an imperfect world so why hide behind our struggles of imperfections that are intended to help us grow and become even more radiant!  When we share our lives with another Beloved, it offers peace knowing someone else is shouldering the pain.  This is how God turns our ashes into beauty.  Living in peace blossoms the true beauty within!

When we open up our lives by sharing areas of weakness that are uncomfortable for us to talk about, it paves the way for God to bring healing and support needed to battle and conquer our darkness.  We are also blessing the other person we’re sharing with because if we are opening up our hearts, that expresses to the other person that they’re loved and worthy of trust.  When we share our lives and struggles with one another, it not only unlocks our fears and the suppressed pain, but it gives God the room to bring healing to that area we didn’t want touched, much less exposed. 

We need community and we need each other; that’s how God designed us.  Sharing our stories offers intimacy and it opens the window to see clearly through the lens of how God intended true friendships to be.  No matter how old we are, there is still a little girl residing within our tender hearts who wants to love and be loved and play.  

Seeing through the lens of a True Friend is acknowledging the need for others.  In fact, a true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes while others believe the smile you’re wearing!  Blameless True Friends 1This requires sharing the good, the bad and the ugly.  You’ll be blessing that other person by sharing your struggles because they’re probably going through similar trials themselves.  Trust is a treasure chest filled with golden nuggets. 

This is the beauty found in connections.  Sharing leads to trust.  Trust leads to healing.  Healing then brings peace and beauty out of the ashes.  True friends make our good days better, but they also offer strength to make the hard times lighter and easier through their love and support.  We just have to reach out and Be-Loved!

We all have hundreds of acquaintance-type friends between social media and through our own channels of networking.  We also have friends that have been in our lives for years, yet for whatever reason, the friendship remains on the superficial side without vulnerability because of past betrayal or through gossip and hurts.  Let’s embrace our friendships or even cultivate new ones enjoying the benefits of being a true friend first so we can get to a new level of deeper understanding and intimacy together.

After all, Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us: 

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
    his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
    and has no one to help him up!

Weekly Challenge:  Challenge yourself this week to reach out and share your story with a friend or a new friend and watch the bond of that transparency and vulnerability remove the veil of shame that you’ve been hiding behind.  When we share our hurts, others will share theirs as well.  There’s nothing in our lives worthy of shame to hide behind.  We have been redeemed and we are Beautiful Beloveds, royal heiresses to the kingdom of God.  Let’s claim what freedom being the real beautiful “us” offers.

There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name! 

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Basketful of Flowers 1

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When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? Part 3

Blameless Live Laugh Love 1.1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

Part 3

Be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.   Ephesians 5:1-2 ~ Live, Laugh, Love

Today was the day I decided to take complete power back and away from my abusers by talking about it.  They no longer rule or have any power through their threats of shame over my heart.  I was hoping that the love found through healthy communication mirroring 1 Corinthians 13:4-13 in being patient and kind, keeping no record of wrongs while not being easily angered, would bring some sort of fresh resolution or even repentance through changed behavior, but…

Someone has to stop generational strongholds of abuse in order to bring justice.  That requires awareness of behaviors and COMMUNICATION as we faith the fear.  Investing precious time into our relationships not only shows love, but it also revives honor. 

This is why I love running to my Bible for guidance because I need calm over chaos.  I refuse to exist in that world anymore.  I want to be more like my loving Savior so I can learn to love better and forgive easier.  Ephesians 5:1-2 tells us to be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.  I choose to live this way the best I can because Love sees through the lens of Truth!  I choose to live, laugh and love much while others live in rage and bitterness.

Being imitators of God that Ephesians 4:29-32 states is hard.  It means to try not letting any unwholesome talk come out of our mouths (especially when we’re upset), but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen…Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Discounting a person’s voice is not only disrespectful, but where’s the love in that? 

Communication takes at least two voices, right?  Well, unless you’re living in the wounded warrior world, that world-of-one torment that engages in battle with thyself and rips your opponent apart in your mind and exhausts you like any real battle would!  All that does is exposes our hearts by holding us captive inBlameless Bee Kind 1 our cells of hell filled with nothing but rage and bitterness.  No wonder we’re angry people.  It also prohibits us from being present because we’re always present in the wrong neighborhood.

I’ll share an excerpt of what my last wounded warrior world was like next time!  It’s sad, but we also have to laugh at times at how we destroy ourselves and waste valuable energy.  Here the honey bees with the stingers say, “If we’re going to die, we’re taking you down with us.”  Who needs the enemy’s affliction; we destroy ourselves by cultivating the hurt that is brewing inside our hearts.  We need to be kind to ourselves.

My speaking coach/mentor challenged me to narrow my writing and speaking skills towards the passion that ignites me to work tirelessly starting up my nonprofit organization, Blameless and Forever Free Ministries.  My heart’s desire and hope is to help meet the needs of those who are hurting by building a bridge between church and state for the oppressed.

Being a survivor myself saved by nothing short of grace after decades of torment, it took me awhile to understand why I have such a gift of love for all beloveds and why forgiveness comes easily.  When you have been hurt much and forgiven much by Love Himself, it makes it easy to pour love into others and situations that need a covering of peace and inspiration.  Plus, I don’t want anyone to suffer all alone because all lives matter!

I have watched far too many Beloveds try and go at it alone and all they are doing by being shackled to shame and guilt is refusing the power that is available to them:  Freedom!  God Blameless Freedom Found in Exposuredid not design us for isolation to hide when we’re embarrassed and humiliated, He designed us to need others and to be seen.  We need the power of our friends’ strength to encourage us to the finish line.  There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name!

With this recent heartache of rejection and my failed attempts at reconciliation, the stinger was easily removed because I didn’t hide in isolation from this “supposed shame” being rejected and unloved; therefore, its infection was thwarted in spreading.  I knew I was loved by God and I needed the help of others to process sharing my heart or depression would have sunk in.  This vulnerability of exposure removed the stinger before it did more damage.  I bounced back rather quickly because my faith radiated who God says I am, along with walking alongside of girlfriends who helped open my eyes to see through the lens of Truth. 

Friendships pull stingers out and bring healing to the sting before its infection spreads through love and support.

I don’t know about you, but I can spend way too much energy judging myself more critically and harsher than any abuser while believing the lies of the enemy.  If only we could remember to spend our energy being the radiance of His Perfect Love!  God does promise us His blessings, but many of these gifts require our active obedience and participation.

This is where God unveils His destiny in bringing beauty from my ashes through His purpose and plan for my pain.  Now I get to love on others who are considered unlovable.  I get to be a voice for those who lost theirs through abuse and abandonment.  And now I’m honored to walk alongside of the masses who are walking through disease and death because I’ve walked victoriously through it myself.

Tasting and seeing the Lord is an invitation to experience the gift of His grace.  “I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.  Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame” (Psalm 34:4-5).  Today I’m living in freedom and flying free of yesterday’s guilt, today’s fears, and tomorrow’s grave.  All because God loves me just the way I am.

There’s something about freedom…  The purity of the innocence in letting go and yet the boldness in knowing your life matters!  We all want to know our lives matter.

Until next time..

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

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I Need A Bath! Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Blameless My Peace I Leave With You

I Need A Bath!

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hello Beautiful!  I pray you’ve been having a blessed week filled with strength to keep pressing in along with a huge supply of patience sojourning this side of heaven.  It’s that time again; it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

I don’t know about you, but I’m filthy and stained!  I need daily cleansing.  I’m not as white as snow as I’d like to be.  I’ve been wallowing through the muck and yuck of mundane tasks on top of demanding peeps.  I need the purifying cleansing that only being bathed in God’s peace can accomplish! 

When we rest in His grace and are cleansed by His living waters, God bestows His Love that lathers up and washes away the filth that is clouding our lenses and keeping us in the wrong neighborhood (mindset).  Those little irritants can add up quickly when we allow them to brew inside our hearts.  It’s amazing how easy it is to become bitter and impatient, snapping on those who dare come within a few feet of us.

Bathing In His Love

God wants us to bathe in His peace as He lathers us with His Great Love, His grace and His tender mercies.  We would bode well if we made it a part of our daily regimen, bathing in His soothing waters of life and peace through prayer and time spent in His Word.  God wants to give us the simple pleasures of life, like bath time. 

Light a few candles and immerse yourself into how faithful God has been bringing you through the day or through the tough month.  Immerse yourself into these purifying waters and take a deep breath and reflect.  This is probably one of the hardest areas for us busy women to accomplish, but it’s so worth the discipline. 

One of the fruits of the spirit is self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).  This governs our decisions and lifestyle choices and attitudes.  This radiance is where we witness the changes in our character that emulate more of the life of Christ.  Rest is a weapon God uses to bless us with.

Blameless Bathtub

We can never forget that Rest is a weapon God blesses us with.  After all, even God rested after the sixth day of work.  The enemy hates when we rest because he wants us stressed out and preoccupied!

God was up to something unique when He added the element of rest to our lives.  If the Lord God Almighty rested on the seventh day (Genesis 2:2-3), that means His Beloveds need rest for restoration and reunification.  How else can we get refilled?  Goditude mindsets take discipline.  After all, we need solitude time to be still and snuggle in close to the Lord.  We can’t let ourselves feel guilty when we take our own time out!  There’s comfort found here, even Jesus took time out for solitude (Mark 1:35). 

This is why I love Ephesians 1:4, it reminds us of what God foreknew, For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight.  In love…”  There’s no way being holy and blameless can be accomplished when we’re overwhelmed and stressed out.

Needs are endless with the pulling and tugging on our time and hearts.  I am trying to be a Beloved that understands this need to practice the discipline of solitude.  Bathtubs help Beloveds push pause, so let’s take a bubble bath and get cleansed so the filth of our days and our exhausting journeys won’t rub off onto others! 

If we’re going to be radiant in a dirty and polluted world, we need self-control to be still and allow our minds to be renewed so we can walk in love.  As St. Augustine said, Love grows within us…“for love is the beauty of the soul.”

“Since love grows within you, so beauty grows.  For love is the beauty of the soul.”  St. Augustine

Weekly Challenge:  The Lord wants His Beloveds radiant.  Let’s make a lifetime discipline choice this week to allow ourselves 10, 15 minutes each day to become one with the Spirit in order to quiet our minds while washing away the filth of each day.  This will empower us with the ability to think His thoughts. 

Lord, we enter your presence with thanksgiving and praise.  We love you, Lord.  For your Love is good and endures forever.  We pray that you would refresh our bodies as you renew our strength.  As Beloveds, we yearn and crave to be restored.  We desire to be more like you and we thank you for the transformation taking place as You renew our minds.  Thank you for this quiet time of reflection as you awaken us to our need to be at rest while we’re still working this side of heaven.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

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When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? Part 2

Blameless New Beginnings 1.1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? 

Part 2

Violence, pain and suffering is predominant in the world today.  Why do children hate their parents?  Why do parents slaughter, use as weapons of mass destruction, or even sell and reject their own children?  How do wars between brother against brother and sister against sister ignite?  Where’s the love?

Hurt People Hurt Others

Jesus came to redeem our hurts, our lives, our families, by and through His blood which cost God so much.  I don’t know about you, but I’m in need of His daily transfusion of blood to cleanse my own soul and wash away my sins.

Needed:  Daily Blood Transfusions

Sadly, the world is full of sick, evil and hurt people whose hurts have never been worked through along with mental illness that has been swept underneath the rug for generations.  Instead of being diagnosed and treated, it has advanced into a full-fledged epidemic. 

It’s tragic because there is no shame in having mental illness.  Anxiety, depression, addiction and eating disorders and rage are prevalent because they have been shamed for far too long.  This world may demand perfection, but as I say in my advocacy:

There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name!

Being vulnerable where deep hurts are involved is more than uncomfortable, but I know there are many Beloveds who need to hear how God’s amazing grace sustained me so they can lean in and press through themselves.  It is hard when the world beats down on you Blameless Crown Tiarra 7making you feel insignificant and irrelevant, and you don’t know where to turn or even if you’re important enough to be seen or matter.  We all want to know we’re enough.

We can’t claim victory when we’re weaponless, have dull blades on our swords, so exhausted we can’t even see or think straight, not to mention when we’re starving and freezing cold.  This is where we get the option to either believe the lies of the enemy or allow God to pour out His Love into our depleted souls by tenderly affirming us.  The way He reaches down and coddles and comforts us next to His beating heart reassures us of our meaningful existence and His Great Love that is found in the beautiful pages of scripture.  I can’t advocate enough for the strength and peace received through peeling the pages of the Bible wide open.  Life literally pours out and ushers you into a relationship that offers freedom and acceptance!

When we’re wounded, even the slightest hiss will send us hiding!

God wants to wrap His everlasting arms around us tight until we slowly release our grip as we become aware and realize how loved and valued we are.  We are so cherished, God pursues our lives.  Us girls love to be pursued, don’t we?  I know I do!  He even serenades over us as He rejoices over our existence (Zephaniah 3:17).  I don’t know about you, but I have never been serenaded so the realization of this warms my tender heart and soul.

God designed us to need and be receptive to this kind of Great Love so we can realize where our worth and value derive from.  His Love is that good, fulfilling and rewarding.  And it never ceases.  There’s nothing we can do to lose His Love either.  For us Beloveds who have been rejected and abandoned, that is nourishment to feast on for our famished souls. 

Seeing ourselves from God’s perspective opens the pathway of our hearts and knocks down the barriers of pride that hinders our confidence.  This way we don’t have to stay hidden, humiliated and ashamed because we were rejected, in our protective shells.  We can stand tall, with feet fitted firmly in the ground, knowing our worth and value.

This is why I constantly share why I go to the Bible first when in distress.  The Word is alive and active.  When I’ve been attacked, forsaken and rejected, thrown out as discarded leftovers, my heart is shattered.  I need guidance, grace, and reassuring tender mercies of love and worth thatBlameless Hebrews 4.12 (2) will help remind me and give clarity to who God says I am.  That is why the Bible is so powerful.

We can’t lose sight of the fact that hurt people hurt others.  Victims of heinous behaviors would be repeating the same thing to others if we didn’t have this loving and powerful Word of God to equip us with the ability to withstand the flaming arrows of the enemy along with the ability to forgive.  This allows us to reach out with compassion to others.  We need to share our testimonies of strength and deliverance.  Hebrews 4:12-13 clears up any miscommunication about the benefits of the Bible:  “For the Word of God is living and active.  Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.  Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight.  Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.”

Beautiful Beloved, being victims of another person’s pain confuses what true, healthy love and behaviors are.  Our worth and value comes from the Lord God Almighty, not anyone else!  This will help us understand why many of us feel unloved and unwanted.  We will do just about everything and anything to fulfill that void.  When others fail to meet our expectations and afflict pain onto our already tattered and fragile lives, we often look outside of ourselves for this very reason. 

God created us with unique qualities that NO ONE BESIDES US has, and without that quality, there would be no beauty in the bunch!  Please do not allow anyone to rob you of your gifts, beauty and talents.  The world needs you!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

Part 1

I’ve been abused, abandoned and rejected.  Now what?  What does that say about me when others treat me as rubbish and waste?  We only discard filth, so does that mean I’m not worthy to be loved, honored and cherished?  Who discards their child with contempt anyways? 

Disclaimer:  This blog series for the next couple months may trigger some Beloveds that have been a victim of abuse.  Abuse and rejection are hard areas to heal.

Who wants to vocalize and admit they’re a victim of abuse, abandonment and rejection?   Not me, but it’s something we need to talk about and share with one another, so…

We all desire to be loved, accepted and belong.  I am no exception.  Admitting I was thrown out as waste and unwanted droppings automatically labeled me as a reject, unwanted, refused, loser, no value, screwed up, refund demanded!  What does that say Blameless Clearance Rack 3about me as a Beloved, my worth and value, and every decision I would make subsequently thereafter? 

When you’re not wanted and abandoned, that rejection tears right through your heart, mind, body and soul.  Plus, you don’t know how to love or be loved; instead you become one whom must perform to others’ expectations in order to be loved.  WRONG!

I’m glad I’m a Beloved who chases after my Lord, even though He never leaves our side.  Otherwise, I truly don’t know how I would have walked through such a lonely, hopeless and heartbreaking journey, much less become the bold and courageous Beloved I am today.  God turned my ashes into beauty.  I know I’m God’s treasured daughter who was once found at the bottom of the dump, but God meticulously cleaned me up and now I’m crowned skipping merrily in freedom, confidence and wholeness.  What a beautiful assurance of His Great Love.  That’s called a beautiful exchange!

As the torturing fire of acknowledgement burns the pit of my stomach as I write, my mouth regurgitates “I’ve been rejected, AGAIN!”  The reality of such an abominable tragedy to any child is overwhelming, but the power from the eruption of St. Tammy’s Emotions exposes an even deeper level of loss and insecurities.

I am so grateful the Lord didn’t consider me scraps that are thrown out to the pigs.  Instead He chooses to love, cherish and relentlessly pursue me so much that He even extended His loving arms down from heaven to protect me when I drove myself off that cliff 37 years ago and redeemed my life with His Great Love.

God doesn’t kick His children to the curb or throw them away like a piece of deplorable regret.  In fact, He calls His children His masterpieces and works of art!  His Love never ceases and He will never forsake us either.  There’s nothing we can do to lose that Love.

When We’re Considered A Piece of Deplorable Regret!

I am not the only person who’s been rejected and abused, much less abandoned.  My heart genuinely grieves for the Beloveds that have been violently tormented.  My teeth grit just thinking about the unconscionable behavior of others.  It’s hell that no one could even begin to understand unless you’ve walked through the valley of the shadow of death yourself. 

Emotional trauma caused by those who profess to love you is the hardest journey to walk through victoriously.  It can cause other mental health issues such as depression, addiction, eating disorders, you name it, just to escape and numb the pain that afflicts the heart and mind.  I know, alcohol makes a great numbing agent, or did!

This is really hard for me to talk about.  Dealing with the tragedies of life and facing it head on is something that is outside of my comfort zone without Mr. Denial, but…

When one is discarded like rubbish, though, this torment leaves a permanent marking from the scorching cauterization of the branding iron.  This imprint of “rejected” forever tarnishes one’s worth and value tragically and effects behaviors regarding life, love and choices and decisions.  Even effects our relationship with God.

God is a God of love and mercy, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love (Psalm 103:8) who never leaves our side.  I’ve been healed by the touch of God and now I understand why I passionately want to help the unlovable because all lives matter and deserve to be loved. 

One thing is absolutely certain besides my tangent:  No one is unlovable and removed from the touch of God!

My bestie lovingly reminded me of the worse offenders to help soothe the sting of my abuser’s manic explosion.  She shared, “Some moms sell their children as sex slaves for rent money and to satisfy their own drug fix.”

We are not the labels our offenders branded us with!

The greatest gift God gives us is family and friendships.  If we’ve been orphaned, God brings us friendships to fill those vacancies and walk alongside of us being the hands and feet of God, along with offering their precious hearts and time.  The love, hope and affirmations we receive from our relationships cultivate our beauty to bloom right where we’re planted.  That’s how we thrive and not just survive.  Investing precious time into our relationships not only shows love, but it also revives honor.

Because we are loved immeasurably more than we could ever imagine, the torturous time feeling invisible and insignificant, you know, overlooked because we are tossed out with the rest of the trash, God sees us.  He not only sees us, He is even proud to be seen with us and calls us the apple of His eye (Zechariah 2:8).  Blameless Crown Tiarra 7To know we are His prized possession and treasured Beloveds should empower us to walk bravely and take risks with confidence knowing He will never leave us. 

When only Love could make a way, being immersed in God’s mercy and love creates a wholeness and contentment of heart.  Knowing we are called His treasured daughters enables us to forgive our offenders.  People are full of pain and pride and sickness.  Shame cripples and shackles.  It’s a powerful membrane.  But we don’t have to stay entangled in the Black Widow’s web of destruction.

Honestly, even though I am at a great place in my life spiritually, professionally and emotionally, admitting that I’m orphaned and not wanted is a hard pill to swallow.  It’s hard to admit that.  It does leave a sense of loss to my heart, but I’ll allow this pain to help others.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless New Beginnings 1.1

 

You Don’t Have To Change A Thing, You Are Beautiful Just The Way You Are! The World Needs What Only You Can Offer!

Blameless Different Culture of Women Final

You Don’t Have To Change A Thing,

You Are Beautiful Just The Way You Are!

The World Needs What Only You Can Offer!

Sitting amongst a loud and crowded restaurant, it was hard not to overhear the many conversations blaring from the lively group of young adult beauties.  Between the excitement of the 4th of July festivities to their summertime travels, one thing was apparent:  They spent more time comparing and competing and criticizing than celebrating the beautiful beloveds they all were.

What is it about us beloveds spending time engaged in conversations that are filled with comparisons, criticism and competition instead of celebrating each other and our lives?  Why can’t we just be, imperfections and all, instead of the superficial boasting of lies?

Being honest here, I am older and wiser being Grammy Tammy, but due to my own battle scars and stitches and imperfections, I was feeling a bit envious myself because I no longer possessed that youthful appearance equipped with perfect skin and a sculpted body; but I only wonder how most Beloveds feel once they get home and process all those destructive comments spewed out through jealousy, comparison and competition?

To Everyone Wishing They Were Someone Else,

We Need You To Be Your Beautiful and Unique Self!

We all want to be seen and heard!  I get that.  We all want to believe that we’re loved and valued.  And we are!  But why do we label others that are different than us?  Why do we size each other up before we even get to know what’s below the superficial facade?  There’s beauty underneath all these differences and scars.

I spent years wasting my own youthful beauty instead of enjoying it by creating this ditzy-blonde alter ego because my intelligence intimated most men coupled with the physical beauty I possessed at the time.  The girls hated me and the boys were afraid of me!  Talk about stepping stones leading to strongholds of insecurities and destruction of any self-worth and value. 

But to defame my God-given gift of intelligence just to fit in and be accepted is similar to what many Beloveds are doing nowadays with hiding behind their perceived imperfections in being different because of the color of their skin, the size of their bodies, and the differing cultures and attitudes similar to the competition and demands dictated by society leading to all these cosmetic surgeries.

My body back then had to be rail thin; in fact, at my old height of 5’11”, I weighed in at 135 pounds, wore a size 3, and I was considered three pounds overweight for my modeling.  Talk about creating a body image struggle at its finest hour.  God forbid to be caught dead in a bikini three pounds overweight at a size 3?  We have been taught to be something we’re not instead of embracing who God designed us to be and the beauty that lies and radiates within.  Look at all the joy and fun we are missing because of this mindset.

Who determines what beautiful is anyways?  Is it a Victoria Secret model with stunning long legs and a sculpted face like Gigi Hadid?  How about a humanitarianism beauty likeBlameless Walls Beautiful Definition Angelina Jolie?  Better yet, how about the beautiful Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton herself, the royal princess loved by all? 

My definition of beautiful is that being beautiful has nothing to do with looks.  It’s how you are as a person and how you make others feel about themselves.  I call and identify all Beloveds I encounter as Beautiful.  Just ask any of my friends, doctors and associates.  Those are spoken words worth repeating because they’re truthful and they build up!

We have to stop the labeling.  We have to stop the comparing.  We have to stop being somebody we were not designed and created to be.  We all have imperfections.  We cannot continue to tear down one another.  We all are uniquely designed with qualities that only WE HAVE!  God designed us to be the only person with our unique qualities.  Now that’s something to embrace and celebrate and be confident about!

How about we start celebrating a new nation this Independence Day determining to believe and behave that all lives matter, realizing our need for each other, to learn values and attributes that the other person can teach, to enjoy the qualities and gifts that others offer, and to celebrate the life and beauty of each Beautiful Beloved.  God designed us all differently for a reason.  Without each other, there is no beauty in the bunch.   

When I was the “perfect 10” by society’s standards, educated model with it all, I hated everything about myself and even tried to destroy it because I didn’t feel I belonged or fit in, and I wanted to be noticed and loved.  And yet with that yearning to be “somebody” at any cost, I was willing to destroy it all in order to be sculpted into something else that society deemed worthy of love.  That is when God proclaimed that He was the sculptor, the Divine artist, and He created a masterpiece who was already beautiful.

Why is it when we have straight hair, we want curly hair?  Better yet, I remember being flat chested and wanting large breasts.  Well, now due to child bearing and age, gravity has blessed me with large breasts and I don’t want them.  You know how hard it is to find blouses that accommodate a larger bust without making you look pregnant?  Hello…

Blameless Without Each Other

Let’s celebrate this Independence Day by embracing our newfound freedom in accepting each other, every color and culture, our bodies, our beauty, our value and uniqueness, and the Beautiful Beloveds God designed us all to be.  No more running and hiding from our beautiful selves.  No more apologizing for who we are.  Let’s embrace the uniqueness that no one else has except for us.  Our lives matter, each one of us.  God designed us all unique with value that no one else has or can offer.  Thank you for contributing your beauty to the bunch.  The world would be dark and gloomy, not to mention flavorless, without your beautiful self.

Enjoy listening to the amazing lyrics and words from other beloveds in this video from Alessia Cara’s song, “Scars To Your Beautiful.”

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!