Tag Archives: #forgiveness

Seek To Understand Before Seeking To Be Understood!

Blameless Seek To Understand

Seek To Understand Before Seeking To Be Understood! 

So hard when words from another hurt like hell.

Hi friends and family!  Our hearts and prayers go out to everyone who’s been affected by the tragedies in Gilroy, El Paso and Dayton. It seems that these hurt/sick people hurting others has turned into an evil epidemic seeing who can outkill one another.

When my son and I were talking about how these hate crimes and hurting individuals have changed the landscape of everyone’s lives, personally involved or not, it tapped into my own fears from being victimized reiterating how we’re all effected by these horrific crimes.

Right after talking with my son, I listened to a girlfriend’s deep pain from defeating and defaming words delivered by a coworker, feeling that no one defended her.

This brought up my own pain from the sting of what others have said and done recently that were still fresh.

Speaking honestly here, there’s a part of me who loves and walks out forgiveness emulating Jesus, but I would rather start ripping out these venomous tongues!  Words are destructive and often leave emotional wounds and scars unhealed.

I may be a follower of Jesus Christ, but I battle my own insecurities and fears just like everyone else. And after what we’ve witnessed through these heinous shootings, we need to choke this hate line and exhibit self-control with L-O-V-E, God’s Great Love.

phonto-64

Life forces us to be many people with differing hats and images within seconds of each other.  Friends in need (homeless beloveds), incarcerated beloveds, along with you and I, we all have hurts, insecurities, brokenness and needs. We just react and respond to them differently.

I keep leaning into these beautiful words of Psalm 85:8.

“Now I’ll listen carefully for your voice
and wait to hear whatever you say.
Let me hear your promise of peace—
the message every one of your godly lovers longs to hear.
Don’t let us in our ignorance turn back from following you.”

Working with friends in need and the incarcerated and their families, one common denominator that is lacking is love and forgiveness; God’s Love, unconditional love. It is easy to hate and judge, especially after witnessing these deadly shootings, but feelings pushed down fester and will destroy.

Tragically, we’ve allowed our unhealed pain to turn into hate. Hurt people hurt others. Instead of communities with living, breathing people, we have become part of the problem hiding behind our screens. We are no longer a part of the solution.

Allowing pain to turn into hate, this great divide becomes a part of the problem and forfeits any solution.

Where’s the person to stand up and defend others when hateful words and evil actions are spoken of and acted out?

Where there are persistent hurts, evil will prevail.

I almost let paralyzing fear stop me from helping another in need yesterday. Our Lord loves it when we move out in faith. People need to encounter extensions of love and kindness being poured out.

Action helps change the impact on our futures, though.

How can we allow God to turn our emotional wounds into good like He promises in Genesis 50:20, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it…”?

Our emotional wounds and bruises fall short in receiving help because only time and grace can process the pain.  Our bruises and pain take more than a quick click.

Blameless Being Understood

Emotional Hurts and Wounded Spirits

Looking back on some of my “most painful” life experiences, the sleepless nights, the tear-stained pillows, the anger and bitterness that developed because the people closest to me delivered nothing but betrayal and disappointment, and the torment in being abused and rejected, God’s Great Love came pouring out!

Our Beautiful Jesus always has a plan for redemption, but…

Amid my all-time lowest moments, and I’m talking crushed, shackled and bound, I’ve witnessed the miraculous power of healing, redemption, reconciliation and restoration. God uses both the good and the bad (Romans 8:28).

Without pain, there’s no healing. Without imprisonment, redemption couldn’t be experienced. If there’s no estrangement, then reconciliation isn’t possible. And without destruction, there’s no need for restoration.

Experiencing this blossoming, this growth, that constructs the very core of who we are and created to become is miraculous.

We just can’t allow ourselves to be defined through this prison of pain.

We Are The Product Of Every Decision

Every day of our lives, we get the opportunity to respond to everything that crosses our path. By remembering that Someone (God) believes we are good enough in their eyes and that we don’t have to measure up to anyone to be loved should usher us into confidence. There’s nothing we can do to be loved more or loved less. It’s a gift to just receive.

Being utilized as a bridge that meets others in their struggles and a source of support and encouragement for building community is a part of the solution. Everything we do today matters. Our impact matters. It effects today and our future.

Seeking to understand others before seeking to be understood will help terminate hate. Let’s be proactive parts to the solution. Forgiveness is a great decision that leads to love!

Blameless Bridge Between Past and Future

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

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How Does One Go From This To… Clearance Rack?

Blameless How Does One Go From This To...

How Does One Go From This To…

Clearance Rack?

When You’re Rejected, Returned, Refused & Recluse!

Rejected?  Returned?  Refused?  Now I’m going Recluse!  Or at least I want to.  I understand why so many tender hearts isolate and go at it alone.

Do you ever feel like the words and opinions of others portray a mental depiction that you thought was developed from your own insecurities being illuminated or hanging out in the wrong neighborhood again? 

Here you are, unbeknownst to you, an infamous motion picture star of a 3D finale.  You’re hanging on a clearance rack for all to see marked down.  Returned and Refused!  Examining you at every angle, nausea sets in due to the lingering stench of their dragon’s breath.  They’re that close.  It makes you want to projectile for many reasons. 

After their relentless review of every imperfection at the cost of each bad angle and exaggeration, they chuckle while announcing the attached “clearance” price tag regarding your worth and value is now stamped “zilch.”  Rejection at her finest hour!

  Infamous Star of Rejection

Being considered “detestable” and “unloved” and “infamous” is a torturous form of rejection to be labeled.  These labels come in many forms, but it’s mainly developed through the words and lies of hurt beloveds who are threatened or want attention, fear being exposed, or even jealously.  They keep these fuel lines of anger, gossip and deceit going by tarnishing our character to make themselves feel better. 

Used Goods on the Clearance Rack

Buy me, buy me, buy me!!!  Sad pleas coming from a Beloved whose Jesus already paid a huge price for.  My redemption cost much.  When our motives are pure and we walk our faith, the flaming arrows from the enemy Blameless Clearance Rack 3are relentless.  Our mouths may be a small member of the body, but its destructive power will do more damage than any tsunami or even a nuclear war could afflict (James 3:5).  Those natural disasters have no power over what the destruction of the tongue can do.  The enemy uses this powerful member to divide and destroy one another by pitting us against each other.  Our tongues speak and spread division and destruction.  How can we celebrate each other when all we’re doing is competing and comparing and criticizing everyone offensively?

Let me share, Beautiful Beloved, when I was hurting due to the lies and actions from others, my Lord assured me that He hears, hurts and hates those words being stamped “no good.”  Our loving Father highlights Proverbs 6:16-19 announcing, “There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to Him:  Haughty eyes (pride), a lying tongue (hello), hands that shed innocent blood (betrayal), a heart that devises wicked schemes (exaggeration of faults), feet that are quick to rush into evil (gossip mongers), a false witness who pours out lies (covering their assets), and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers (drama queen).”

After unleashing my Noah’s Flood into my bestie’s lap that nearly took her out due to the force of the download, did I again realize that women are ferociously catty and instead of Blameless CEOswanting to celebrate each other’s (CEOs) lives, they spend exhausting amounts of time criticizing each other while comparing each other all in the name of jealousy.  Here I’m trying to love and encourage them through support and they’re devising wicked schemes to take me down.  As much as it hurt, and trust me, it hurt and felt like hell unleashed on my heart similar to Edward Scissor Hands shredding it; that’s when the Lord reminded me, “Are you seeking the approval of man or me?”  

Praying for people who have slandered us and continue to spread lies is another form of persecution where the Lord wants us to walk through this darkness exhibiting and exposing His light through love.  This is where Tragedy Meets His Majesty revealing His magnetic glory. 

If only I can remember to count this friction as pure joy, it will strengthen me as I persevere and allow His magnetic glory to be clearly revealed (James 1:2).  The world first hated Jesus (John 15:18-25) and I am a part of His Army of Hope, so…

I’m being honest here, sometimes it is hard to pour out love when others’ venomous tongues are sneaking around to kill, steal and destroy.  The pain afflicted by a few was intense.  It was pain that I hadn’t recognized in quite a while and didn’t know what to do with the infection from the venomous bite.

Processing this pain requires intimacy with the Father to unleash His fruit.  The fruit of the Spirit clearly announces what’s going on in our hearts and behind these poker faces, but it breaks my heart how we’re hurting my Lord by our hardened hearts and lack of relationship with Him.  We leave our Bibles unopened.  We just hang out in the four walls of our deception. 

Purification of our hearts are needed when we’re not walking out what we say we believe.  Congregations are not holding tanks or places to perform to gain worldly power and media prestige.  This burden of Godly anger is something I am finding hard to keep restrained.

Those stings of rejection that were repeatedly gnashing at my body and penetrating through my armor made me feel like I was being set up to be hung out to dry.  Here I was living out what Proverbs 31:8-9 says about “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.  Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy” and people reacted by attacking my loved one and spread lies about his precious life.

But…  I give you permission to continue to poke, prod and hang me out to dry as you continue to squeeze the life of Jesus out of me because its splashing will get on you and effect you.  That’s a sprinkling of His Love that goes deep into your soul and its fragrance is nothing but pure sweetness.

I choose to bear witness to my Jesus and love you.  I choose to forgive you.  I see how this school of pain has developed perseverance and character in me.  You may have “intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” through an explosion of pure magnetic glory (Genesis 50:20).  I rest my case!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Tragedy Meets His Majesty (2)

Forgiveness & Its Power ~ I Choose To Forgive! Will You Forgive Me? Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Forgiveness & Its Power

I Choose To Forgive!

Will You Forgive Me?

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hi Beautiful!  I pray your week is being showered with love and joy as you walk faithfully through each day radiating that Beautiful You!  Many prayers are going out to you this week that our Lord covers you with an outbreak of undeniable peace and joy that changes the atmosphere around you as you become aware of all the beauty and wonder surrounding your presence.  After all, you are highly favored!  It’s that time again; it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

Forgiveness…  Boy, forgiving someone when you have been hit hard by their flaming arrows and emotional darts seems like a ludicrous thing to do, but is it? 

Will you forgive me?  I am so sorry!  Four simple words really, but four words we rarely hear today, or use.  Why are we so afraid to ask for forgiveness, much less extend it?  It’s called Faith the Fear!  When you faith the fear, it becomes a clear example of valor and bravery to utter those simple words of “Will you forgive me for my participation in this division?”

Since the Word says the truth will set us free, the greatest gift we can give to ourselves and others is to extend God’s Great Love to work in and through us.  Being the hands and feet of God requires complete surrender and submission during the pain which offers forgiveness.  God did not design and create us for ourselves, He created us for His pleasure. 

As I have found out, when you extend the grace to forgive others unexpectedly, the domino effect is an overwhelming gift of grace that keeps on giving.  One person changes the dynamics of more than just those around them.

Where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom; but if we want to be like our Jesus, having the freedom to forgive or not reflects our relationship with Him.  That’s worth chewing on.  When the Lord takes up residence inside of us, a whole new standard of living is put into place.  Sadly, we appear to have lost that reverence and responsibility somewhere.

Anyone can say they are a Christian, but when you’ve been loved by the Father God and have a living, active and intimate relationship with Him, forgiveness is a choice that comes naturally, or the desire to forgive is.  Actually doing it is another thing because of the many fears associated with it along with our egos.  Shall we say P-R-I-D-E!

We have all been hurt by spouses, family, friends, and even our pastors and leaders in our congregations.  The pleas and cries of many beloveds is pain from not forgiving others.  We carry it around not realizing its effects on others.  That distrust and lack of intimacy filters through and interferes with our reception in being loved on and poured into.  Forgiveness through Love clears the way for blessings offering peace, joy and hope.

Why do it?  I surrendered my life during the intense pain to the one who had rescued my soul by walking out my faith being bold and courageous.  I chose to forgive those who completely shattered my heart and world; thereby ushering in Noah’s Flood towards freedom.  It really wasn’t hard, but it did take bravery.  Magical consequences that only Love Himself could deliver.

Three years ago I was captivated by the lyrics of Jason Upton’s song called the Table” which I pray you will listen to, awakening your understanding about forgiveness.  I can’t begin to encourage you enough to take 15 minutes in quiet reflection to receive all that needs to be said about forgiving one another’s grievances against each other.  These lyrics deliver joy and peace that surpasses all knowledge versus a lifetime of torment and bitterness.  

The pure in heart will see God…

If our faith and testimony is to mirror the life of Christ with a childlike heart, then that wonder requires that we have our hearts cleansed.  I understand and totally get how asking another person to forgive you when you feel you’re the one who has been violated seems foolish.  It causes anxious thoughts and makes us uncomfortable.

The way I see it, if our ocean tears developed into a Noah’s Flood that Hoover Dam could not contain, then that person occupies a tender portion of our heart whether we want to believe it or not and deserves to be forgiven.  We have been forgiven much, now it’s our turn to extend that grace.

Weekly challenge:  Follow Jesus’ life and example by choosing to forgive one person this week.  Just one!  It takes two to tango and if their violation caused a hole in your heart that is not life threatening, write them an email, a letter, go to their house, or make a phone call and just say, “Will you forgive me for my participation in this division?”  You might be amazed at their response and the freedom you all receive.

1 Peter 4:8 reminds us, Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.  Let’s choose to be weapons of righteousness, because the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10). 

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Africa Ubuntu