We Remember, Honor and Thank all of our Fallen Heroes and the Great Cost!

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We Remember, Honor and Thank All Of Our Fallen Heroes!

God Bless America.  May We Never Forget This Great Cost!

As we awaken to new beginnings, peace and amazing sunrises each and every day, especially on Veterans Day, we remember, thank and honor all of our fallen heroes who selflessly served and sacrificed with their lives that we so easily seem to take for granted.  We appreciate your sacrifices and the courage it’s taken to defend our country.

Blood That Was Shed!

Blameless Veterans Neil Thomas Photograph

God Bless America!  Our heartfelt love, devotion and prayers are extended to the courageous men and women who continue to fight for justice in protecting our freedoms.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

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To Belittle…

To Belittle Is To

be little!

Should you ever find yourself the victim of another’s bitterness, their smallness, or even their insecurities, remember… things could be worse… you could be them!

Oh my…

No, thank you! I’ve had my fill of the angry birds and abusers for a lifetime.

Today I was reminded of God’s amazing love and His protection in guarding my heart when a family member attacked and belittled me.

Abusers are a part of my DNA. Lord knows I’ve learned from the best! But one thing I have learned and am so grateful for is, Greater is He that lives in me than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4).

The beauty of transformation. Thank you, Jesus!

And I don’t take “my DNA” lightly. The blood that runs through my veins now is kingdom-filled and full of life flowing with God’s Love, not hate and spite of the enemy that comes to kill, steal and destroy!

Am I upset?

It’s time to break through the mold and thank Jesus for His life and freedom in being beautiful beloveds who are dearly loved, imperfect and yet, His magnificent works of art, right?

I want to be free of all these deeply-seated wounds and the broken pieces that are hindering me from my God-given identity and purpose.

How about you?

Blameless Breaking Free

When another belittles or tries to pretend we’re a bad person so they don’t feel guilty about the things they did personally to us or said about us, running from confrontation and any accountability whatsoever, we are most like Christ when we remain silent under attack.

And let me be brutally honest here…

It is sooooo freakin’ stinkin’ hard to remember this when being assaulted. People can be savage!

Belittle may be defined as to “make (someone or something) seem unimportant,” but that’s an understatement. People are cruel. Even family members. This is their way of projecting their insecurities onto others and what they wished they actually were.

So when walking through another’s assault that deems my life as “worthless,” the sole blame for their problems, it is near impossible to be quiet.

Where’s my voice, Lord?

Gag me with peace!

How can my breastplate be shielding my heart when I can still feel pain ricocheting off my shield?

This breastplate of righteousness is what protects and guards our heart which is the very seat of our emotions, you know, our self-worth and trust factor.

Thank God I’ve been touched by my Beautiful Jesus who loves me and I can run to Him for refuge knowing He’ll never forsake me.

When you’ve been completely rejected and abandoned, you need tender coddling and assurance to deal with persecution and courage to walk through life confident and strong.

Sweet friends, the piercing of our hearts requires immediate healing so the pain will not attach and fester into a venomous bitter root. When stuffed down, it will eventually mirror the aggressor’s ugly actions with death rolling from our tongues!

This reiterates why James talks about the tongue being a small but powerful member that destroys everyone and everything in its path (James 3:1-12). Who needs to fear a nuclear war when our mouths are more destructive?

Forgive me for the profanity below, but it speaks to my carnality as it releases toxins from the sting incurred from an embittered person’s assaults.

Blameless Projection Accountability

Just being transparent…

It’s hard to pray for those who hurt us, but loving our enemies and doing good to those who hate us is brutally challenging. Not to mention blessing those who curse us is even harder (Luke 6:27-29).

I’m still a work in progress, but it can be done when we’re filled with God’s Love.

Remembering to be on guard equipped with our shields of faith when assaults come out of nowhere takes practice. We lose our focus easily. Guarding our hearts and minds requires being grounded daily in God’s Word. This helps thwart the attacks from distracting us and subtracting our worth.

Our worth was never theirs to give us in the first place, so they cannot take away what was not theirs to give anyways.

Words hurt. They sting. They rob us and can leave us depleted!

Belittling is flat-out cruel and a form of emotional abuse. The best rebuttal is to love and respond with a blessing. That takes a BIG heart of courage! Any fool can retaliate; just saying…

God wants His Beautiful Beloveds building others up because we know what it’s like to be torn down and ripped to shreds.

So…

“Never let anyone belittle you. Their unkind words are a reflection of their insecurities and what they wish for you to be.” Trust in yourself and believe in who God says you are:

His Masterpiece!

Until next time...

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

Peace In A Violent World…

Can It Really Be Achieved?

According to Isaiah 26:3, God will keep in Perfect Peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you!

With all the strife, division, violence and destruction in today’s world, whether you are a part of it or have been effected (all of us), where do we go to seek shelter and refuge for peace?

The threat is real. Not even our congregations, a place of worship, is safe and sacred anymore. Can we really experience God’s perfect peace in turmoil?

I believe we can be steady and stable during the surrounding chaos if our trust is comforted with God’s mighty power and unchanging love. We don’t have to be shaken by all these cataclysmic events.

I loved how the Country Music Awards last night opened their ceremonial procession with singing Amazing Grace and extending words of peace and harmony! It is fitting, timely and full of truths.

The only Truth we can hold onto right now in a world that is full of destruction is God’s amazing grace! 

We Need To Love The Best We Can And Bloom From Our Roots

How do we love each other and unite together in a world where people would rather kill than sit down and communicate to express our thoughts and feelings or even agree to disagree?

I’m trying to lean into the Lord myself knowing Jesus wept by putting ALL my trust into Him so I can live in peace. I’m a beloved encountering many tragedies myself. But sometimes with all these worries on my plate, all I want to do is run away to my refuge located at the beach and hide while denying reality. 

Blameless Trust Your Path

The beach is my safe spot, my refuge, a place where I experience life-sustaining peace. This is where I get to meet and connect with my Lord freely and uninhibitedly. The presence of each sunset that the Lord magnificently paints just for me brings immeasurable peace as I engage in this period of stillness for rest, reflection and renewal.

I don’t know how my contribution towards “change” is going to look, but I’m not going to allow fear or worry to hinder my moving forward and trust my path. This is going to require God’s perfect peace; peace to hear, to guide and to direct each step.

God’s Love reaches to the depths of our discouragement, our despair, and even death. We are never lost or singled out from His Great Love. Tragically, we have chosen to remove God from our lives and homes and then we wonder where He is when calamity strikes.

I know what the Lord has done for me and what He has done through me. Let me share, His love builds bridges where division has separated and divided.

God’s love reaches every corner of every single one of our experiences!

God’s Love is immeasurable, like the ocean. With its vastness, you realize you’re but one part of many contributors to this magnificent portrait being painted. God’s peace is orchestrated through this opera of brilliant blue-jeweled water as the ocean music soothes with its gentle rippling waves. The air is heavy with ocean spray as the sea song of waves soothe and cleanse the soul.

This reinforces we have power, TOGETHER, with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge (Ephesians 3:18). 

Blameless Psalm 84.12

We wonder why our world is where it is today with all the death, destruction and division when we’ve removed God completely from our lives and homes unless we want to cast blame. I don’t have all the answers, but we can no longer sit back and do nothing.

In order to contribute to change, we need to step out and come together understanding WE EACH MAKE UP and have A PART and responsibility FOR CHANGE through common ground. That takes trust!

Common ground is having 75 courageous women coming together one after another in bringing awareness of the heinous acts against women that Harvey Weinstein violated for decades. It took beloveds who were brave enough to stand up for the rights and justice of others and say enough is enough to initiate change. We can’t let fear and worry paralyze!

Coming Together, Praying Together, and Changing The World Together!

Change can be beautiful. This is where God turns our ashes into beauty. It starts with one bold and determined beloved. Where that bridge is built, others will come. It may initially be awkward, but through Love Himself, all things are possible!

Thoughts and prayers need to be lived out WITH actions! Prayer initiates action, not complacency. This requires peace to trust the One leading. I personally am not going to stop loving the unlovable, nor am I going to stop reaching out extending my heart and hand to those who need to witness the hands and feet of God in action because of fear or worry.

Blameless Darkroom Negatives

We can have a significant voice in this world. Peace overrides worry and fear. Worry only produces negatives in its darkroom. We can be gentle, firm and confident with peaceful spirits when we live out our lives trusting in the One Who is in control and Who will bring vengeance to those who try to kill, steal and destroy.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Beautiful When We Come Together

Highly Favored & Blessed

 

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Highly Favored & Blessed 

Smile

Next time someone dares or cares to ask you how you’re doing; stop, look them square in the eyes and defy a smile by saying, “Highly favored and blessed!”  Talk about a memorable departure. 

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Smile, Beautiful! 

It’s Becoming On You

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Lots!

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He Loves Me,

He Loves Me Lots! 

Perfect Love!

Aromatic fragrances and sweet lyrical sounds excited my senses as I inhaled pure joy and eager anticipation.  These heightened sensations drew me towards the direction that was greeted with excitement as my heart jumped with joy in unison with each footstep that led me closer to the propped door.  The simplistic and innocent melody being sung beneath the covers amplified the subtle undertones. 

Upon arrival, I stopped dead in my tracks instead of plunging in through the door.  I usually fly onto the bed to receive that much needed sugar fix I crave that can only be satisfied through the hugs and kisses and giggles of my beloved granddaughter.  The restraint delivered through the quiet peek from the door captured more than sweet memories. 

The dangling of the tiny feet resembled more of a banging sensation similar to that of a tambourine along with the precious whispers of the words delivered.  This clanging cymbal was something that her daddy mastered and brought me great joy.  You can’t help but dance when memories are that vivid.  This ushered me right into the presence of praising my Lord for all His amazing gifts and love!

The innocent melodic words flowing freely without any reservation from a two-and-a-half-year-old were simply,  “My Carson, I love you.  My Carson, I love you.  My Carson.  My Carson is good, good, good.”  Then a brief moment of silence and the singing continued with “One, two, three, four.  Two, three, four.  Five, six.  One, two.  One, two.”  Silence erupts as the wrestling of the sheets breaks through with, “He loves me, he loves me not.  He loves me, he loves me not.”

Here my precious granddaughter was laying on my bed thinking about her adored three-year-old friend, Carson, with her legs flailing about in open air while pulling the petals away from flowers that were sitting on my nightstand.  My heart leaped with joy as I watched with admiration how precious and innocent the words flowing carefree intertwined with her contentment to just be and receive.  She had mastered that delicate art of basking long enough to ponder about love after awakening from a nap.

Listening to those tender words, “My Carson, I love you.  He loves me, he loves me not,” suddenly reiterated how God’s Love never ceases.  There is nothing we could ever do to make God not love us.  If only we could arise and take a few brief moments each day to bask into His Great Love.  This is why I’m such an advocate of His Word!  Daily immersion equips us to press through boldly each day remembering how loved, chosen, pursued and valued we are.

We need to remember, reiterate and emphasize while changing our words to reflect “He loves me, He loves me lots.  He loves me, He loves me lots!”

I want my Princess Ella to grow up knowing that she is Loved, ALWAYS, and Lots (LAL)!  No matter what happens in life, there is nothing she can do to run from or separate herself from our good, good Father’s Love.  And when she questions it, all she has to do is read her Love Letter, her Bible, and ask the Lord to show her what He thinks about her while she rests at His feet.  I pray she constantly awakes knowing she is unconditionally loved and can sing out loud,  “He loves me, He loves me lots!  He loves me, He loves me lots!”    

I can remember what it was like to feel and think I never belonged or that I was not loved.  It distorted every choice and decision I ever made for decades.  Talk about insecurities and strongholds that developed.  I felt my identity was based on the power delivered from my family, career, income, power and prestige, education, children, you name it.  All of that left me unfulfilled, unloved, and lacked any long-standing self-worth and identity. 

Now that I know where my worth and value are derived from and how loved I am by our good, good Father, and it’s unconditional and never ceases, I am walking confidently with my Godfidence (confidence given by God) knowing I am not only loved just the way I am, but I am Loved Lots!

Being Loved is the most valuable and cherished possession one could obtain.  It not only offers great riches through friendships, healing, transformation, and miraculous treasure chests filled and overflowing with daily gifts just awaiting to be picked up and opened, but it’s free and one in which we all thrive and bloom under.  Maybe that is why Jesus was telling us to be more like little children in Matthew 18:3.

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to change my thinking and loudly proclaim to my Princess Ella that she is LOVED, ALWAYS, and LOTS!  May we never forget to remember and share the power delivered from the Truth that “He loves me, He loves me lots.”  After all, that is the meaning behind 1 John 4:8-21.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

I’ve Been Caught!

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I’ve Been Caught!

Now What?

I’ve been caught!  Now what?  What’s a girl supposed to do?  Should I apologize?  What for, I didn’t ask for this disregard.  Should I just keep quiet to cover over the offense of another?  Now why would I do that, especially given the fact that statistics show the perpetrator will continue?  Should I run away with my tail between my legs or should I stand firm, tall, and roar like an angry lion does announcing his forewarning?

Ha!  I know what I would like to do!  If we’re being honest here, I know most of us would like to see revenge occur when others devalue us, especially when one’s heart has been hurt and violated, right?

That’s when my very own advocate, Jesus Christ, convicts my heart and reminds me that His ways of Love and justice, not to mention vindication (revenge, yes!), will be accomplished completely different than anything I could ever conjure up.

My initial attempts at confronting through Love will be honored, while those who devalued my life and time will be instructed in how to better handle these situations in the future because Love is patient.  Love is kind.  Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

Honestly, after hearing those beautiful words from my best friend, the Holy Spirit, my Comforter, I had about a three-second sense of peace and contentment; but then the decay stemming from the bitter root inside of my heart wanted out and her revenge didn’t want it accomplished through God’s Love or His ways of justice.  I am just being totally honest here because I’m far from a saint.  I have feelings and they run deeper than any roots or any circumference of the cedars of Lebanon.  Sadly, there are times I’m ready and able to devour and feast on my prey that I’ve been lying in wait for.

It’s a beautiful thing my good, good Father knows me and loves me just the way I am, because right after I completed my Tammy Tantrum at her finest, my Lord reminded me of my beliefs; that every affliction that comes my way and brings God glory through reaching and teaching others is well worth any vindication my mind could dare conjure up because I have seen firsthand the destruction that pride and hate promotes.  Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs (Proverbs 10:12). 

My Lord reminded me to focus on matters worthy of my attention; that I have quite a challenge before me that will consume all my energy and to let Him take care of this.  Isn’t that what a loving daddy does; gently reminds us what to release, where to keep our focus, and to trust Him for the outcome while He blesses us with peace that surpasses all knowledge (Philippians 4:7).  How else are we going to make it through another day without it?  Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I am so grateful I have the freedom to press into His Word through intimacy and memorize scripture that I cling to for dear life because it’s at these moments when I’m ready to attack by fighting back that my heart and soul gently leads me to quiet pastures in order to regroup and calm down.  Sometimes that even requires grabbing me by the bit.  It’s better than ripping someone’s head off through words that could easily spew out of my mouth or of the pouring myself a glass of wine just to temporarily calm down which leads into several along with a headache the next day.

Since I’ve been declared innocent and righteous, it only makes sense then to extend that grace to those that have harmed me through Love.  It does not mean they will not suffer any subsequent repercussions of their actions, it just helps me to release the sting and be healed.  This will require being completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in Love.  Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.  There is one body and one Spirit – just as you were called to one hope when you were called (Ephesians 4:2-4). 

You might be saying, “Can you really let God have vengeance?”  Oh, it was hard at first.  That’s when I get to share that after you’ve been caught and touched by my Lord and realize how pursued and chosen you are, abiding in His Love and ways is amazing.  The freedom from the bondage and pain that those handcuffs caused releases a little snicker underneath your breath once your spirit (your BFF, best friend forever) reminds you, In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you (Proverbs 25:22).

Now that’s worth a happy dance!  And my heart gets to leap with joy knowing that through loving crazily while being kind to those I encounter that are hard and messy this side of heaven, pours more than hot coals onto their heads.  My God, my Lord, claims vindication in the only way that could reap lasting results; Love!  I’m really not that kind, it’s just a byproduct of the fruit of the Spirit; Love!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

My Heart Bleeds

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My Heart Bleeds

My heart bleeds…  When you ignore and don’t see me.  My heart bleeds…  When you say you love me and yet look right through me.  My heart bleeds…  When I don’t feel accepted because of my needs.  My heart bleeds…  When you turn your back on me.  My heart bleeds…  When you say you don’t need me!

My Lord Holds My Heart

After pulling myself out of my car exhausted, praying that the Lord would fill me up with strength and love, I dragged myself into the welcoming area.  Every step was riddled with physical pain, but Blameless Animated Heartthe lack of any acknowledgement or greeting of my mere presence ushered in a deep sense of loss and rejection which cut right through to the very core of my being.  Here I’m generally the one welcoming and loving on others wherever I go, but today the only image I saw was the turning of backs.

My heart sank with rejection which made me want to run and hide.  Better yet, it prompted me to visit my bad neighborhood filled with triggers that were rearing their ugly heads.  My mind was filled with scenarios like, Do I smell like B.O.?  Do I have precarious toilet paper hanging in the wind and no one can look at me without laughing?  I could live with that!  Worse yet, what is so repulsive about me, my mere presence, that would trigger people to turn their backs on me?  Great, now this forced meltdown is causing Hoover Dam to burst from my tear ducts!

To make things worse, right before my heart leaped from my chest in despair, I noticed five known leaders who were huddled together in a corner watching my every step.  The closer I got to them, the quicker they all turned their backs on me to face the door.  Now mind you, when all backs simultaneously turn in the opposite direction, it doesn’t take Einstein to figure out that the consolation and acknowledgement I craved today was going to stay unmet; or was it?

I am so grateful for our Great Counselor that John 14:26-27 (MSG) talks about because when four of the five backs turned against me, it threw a dagger deep into my heart that made me want to do an about face and run like the wind on that cold and stormy day!  Their disregard felt more like the arctic blast.  I resolved to pull up my big girl panties and wipe my tears as I felt peace warming my heart and hearing, “I see you, Beautiful.”  I remembered the meaning and intention behind John 14:27, I don’t leave you the way you’re used to being left—feeling abandoned, bereft.  So don’t be upset. Don’t be distraught.” 

That’s when the Holy Spirit reminded me how my Lord Himself experienced this great pain just so He could relate, engage and identify with our sufferings.  The Spirit helps us walk through these painful encounters bravely because we’re so wrapped in His Love and know where our worth and value come from.  That’s affirmation!  Jesus often says, Beloved, My heart bleeds when you ignore me.  My heart bleeds when you turn your back on me.  My heart bleeds when you say you don’t need me.  My heart bleeds when you don’t accept and love me.  My heart bleeds when you don’t believe in me. 

My goodness, had it not been for the Holy Spirit’s comfort and tugging, I would have succumbed to the pain afflicted from the flaming arrows and emotional darts that penetrated my armor.  We all get dressed more often than not without our armor on or even with our breastplates on backwards.  This leaves our hearts vulnerable to the seat of our emotions and self-worth exposed. Without knowing the love and pursuit of our Lord, defeat would strip any confident beloved!

I don’t know about you, even though I’m jovial, I don’t always remember that I have royal blood, crowned with favor, am pursued and chosen while always being unconditionally loved.  I am surrounded by a community where my stink and scarred and beat-up presence journeying this side of heaven is welcomed and supported, knowing my exposed back is covered.  I need to know I am accepted when I don’t feel beautiful.  I need to be able to cry and receive a hug and shoulder without judgment by those I do life with.  I need to be able to bleed right there while my peeps come in close, not afraid to weave love and support through every stitch until the bleeding stops.  That’s the meaning of a heartfelt community and one that Jesus offers!

Remember the words of our Jesus:  My heart bleeds when you don’t trust me (John 14:6-12).  My heart bleeds when you ask for help and refuse to believe (1 Cor. 2:9).  My heart bleeds when you feel you’re not beautiful and I created you as my masterpiece (Eph. 2:10).  My heart bleeds when you say you’re afraid and lonely, yet you forget to grab ahold of my hand as we sojourn together (Isaiah 41:10-13).  My heart bleeds when you believe your worth is of no value and yet I died for you (John 3:16-18).  My heart bleeds when you know nothing of me (1 John 4:7-21).     

Most Importantly,

My Heart Bleeds When You Say

You Don’t Need Me!

Until next time…

Blameless Flower 6.6

Living With Addiction Day 16 ~ Broken Behaviors of Abuse

Blameless Chains 7

Living With Addiction

Strongholds of Shame

The Broken Behavior of Abuse

Day 16 of 40

Shame and Abuse, two powerful words used in our everyday lifestyles and conversations denoting the ugly reality of life.  Do we really understand their correlation and definition to one another?  Better yet, what could they both possibly have to do with my living with addiction?

According to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary, shame is defined as “a feeling of guilt, regret, or sadness that you have because you know you have done something wrong”; and abuse is defined as “a corrupt practice or improper or excessive use or treatment.”

Many people ask me, “How could a person be so amazingly strong and confident with unfathomable faith and yet be an advocate for others after having stayed in these horrific abusive relationships for so long?”  My answer, S-H-A-M-E!

Remember, I am a byproduct of a long generational lineage of shame living with addiction.  So many of the behaviors I learned throughout the years were quite different than what most individuals would deem appropriate or allow themselves to be subjected to.  I am a work-in-progress and will continue to be until I reach the finish line this side of heaven.

My thought processes reflected and perceived everything that was happening to me as my own fault.  I deserved whatever form of punishment being afflicted on me because I did not conform to my controller’s demands.  That’s the game of shame; us victims take and carry the blame for what our abusers do.

Abusers entangle their prey initially through shame.  The victims get caught into this web spun with deceit and blame forcing them to be subjected to numerous stings from the venom that weakens and clouds their lens of perception.  They find themselves being exhausted and entrapped into this web of destruction with no way to escape and end up hanging there alone until death.

I will be using words such as “husband” and “family members” throughout.  Please understand that I’m not here to shame the living or the dead.  This is where being married a couple of times shields the identity along with having a large family.  So when I refer to my husband’s abuse or affairs and my family member’s spitting into my face, it is to bring awareness to what I was subjected to in order to share my story and not focus on the identity of the abuser. 

I will be sharing how my husband controlled me through the means of force and threat by brandishing a gun, strangulation, threats in taking my children away, verbiage that would alarm any law enforcement officer as forms of manipulation and control to help bring awareness as to why I lived under such horrific conditions along with my current struggles in balancing the fine line between healthy boundaries of love versus enabling.

Let us not forget how addiction ties in nicely here also!  Since my life was full of shame, depression, addiction, and now abuse, my initial go-to for escape and consolation was alcohol and cracking open my Bible.  What a contrast, I know; but I am being honest here and how it just reiterates that God works best in hot messes and He loves us just the way we are! 

So…  How were my chains of abuse severed that set me free from the bondage of the physical and emotional scars that held me down on the cell of hell’s floor for several decades?

I’m going to end today’s writing with another disclaimer.  Hearing the world say, “You’re so strong.  You’ve been through so much, I wish I could have the strength and faith like you.  I wish I could have your joy.”  Ha!  Hello…  What do I say, “I am not shielded from bad things, quite the contrary.  I am obedient and stand firm on my faith.  That takes action and practice, not complacency and laziness.

I am far from strong.  I am weak.  I am fragile.  I am frail and broken, but I am living proof of the definition found in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10; God’s grace and power is made perfect in weaknesses.  My heart aches and bleeds just like yours.  I’ve just learned how to tap into the authority that is given to me through faith and grace and not go through life focusing on fear, excuses and complaints.  That’s the antidote that’s available to everyone who believes!  It’s called faith, the true source of where our strength and power comes from.

I blossom hearing God say, “Come here, Beautiful!  I love it when you spend time sharing your fears and dreams with me, beautiful daughter of mine.  I’m so proud of you that you are allowing My Spirit to transform you through faith and trust.  Your reliance unleashes the authority given to all my children who believe.  Now you can look back and see what I’ve been saying to you all along.  There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you.  Trust me.  Just ask and receive.”

Wow, what a beautiful imagery of what amazing Love awaits for God’s Beloveds who care to engage in a relationship with Him by merely sitting at His feet while reading His love letter (Holy Bible) being humbled, honest and exposed knowing His Truths will set us free.  That’s called a relationship! 

Until next time…

Living With Addiction Day 4 ~ Never Give Up On Yourself

Blameless Never Give Up

Living With Addiction

Never Give Up On Yourself

Day 4 of 40

My precious loved ones:  I am hoping you’re reading this because you have mentioned your awareness in rage and haste.  For starters, I love you with all my heart and soul and am so sorry you’re hurting!  ♥♥  Sometimes Perfect Love requires discipline and correction; this is how we learn.  There is no shame or blame here with what has happened, just the awareness of the accountability and reaching out for help!    

And even though you may not believe it, the pain I’m feeling is more than a broken heart, it’s a loss; the greatest loss of loved ones that any family could ever be blessed with.  That leadership gift that graces your lives with struggles is the testimony needed to share and relate with the world.  None of us are perfect; we all make mistakes and we just need to learn how to recover from them and get back up in order to grow.  Change is hard; I know this one all too well.

We all need the extension of the olive branch from time to time.  Grabbing ahold of it, though, presents many challenges filled with unknowns, but there is nothing to fear with Perfect Love.  The door of faith and favor and fulfillment is just waiting for you to grab ahold of and walk through.  My love will never stop; though it be afar right now!  God sees my tears and hears my prayers for the deliverance of anger, addiction and abuse.  This cycle needs to stop!

Living with addiction and its associated strongholds of anger, abuse and depression is a pattern that is being repeated over and over again in our families.  It has even claimed the life of some!  We are all beautiful specimens of our generations past so instead of running and hiding from the pain and patterns out of fear and shame, let’s embrace it and sever these addictive qualities. 

I kind of know what you’re feeling right now; abandoned and rejected, scared and confused.  I get that!  I am sorry you’re hurting.  I have felt that way myself more times than I care to admit.  This is what is tearing me apart the most because you are so loved and there is help waiting.

There is no shame or embarrassment here, just acknowledgement of the need for help and owning up to your own responsibility and asking for forgiveness.  Change is necessary for healthy relationships.  It’s a tough road, but a healthy mindset is powerful and full of peace.  That’s what counselors, support groups, family, and your responsibility in walking through those doors offer.  Going at it alone will only repeat, even intensify, the problem and another generation be cursed.

We have two choices:  Live with it or live without it.  I am no longer living with addiction or its byproduct.  I still struggle with my own strongholds of fear and denial, let alone anger and depression, but that is something the Lord will continue to work with me on this side of heaven.  I am not perfect.  No one is!  That’s the beauty of life blossoming.

I am not an enabler, nor am I co-dependent on the chaos and control spewing from the venom that entangles others into a massive web of destruction.  I decided to sever this dysfunctional lifestyle and embrace the protection offered from the umbrella of God’s grace and mercy to be protected from the storm causing all this pain long ago and follow up on my boundaries laid out.

Fear may have driven my entire life from the deposits of all the strongholds, but I will not engage in that battleground any longer.  I opened the chambers of my heart, but now with becoming healthier and stronger from living away from all the abuse, that world I left behind many years ago is where it resides; in the past!  It is scary, chaotic, and depleting and not a healthy environment.

Becoming healthy is an amazing freedom to live in!  I am seeing how God has transformed my own life because fear is loosening the reins of dictatorship controlling my decisions.  I am no longer surrounded by the fuel lines of anger and aggression and control that used to manipulate me.  I still struggle, but am prevailing.  I can see so clearly now how I do not belong in those strongholds God miraculously delivered me from.  

I may grieve now for a time and it will be hard, but by hanging onto the Lord, the Perfect Love who casts out all fear (1 John 4:18) and whom I know and trust wholeheartedly, this stretching will be brutal because I must be patient and await God’s timing to perform His miraculous healing.  I am walking by faith and not by sight; my faith walk.  It’s the being removed and patient part while grieving that will challenge my faith. 

When we’re awaiting the restoration and healing of our loved ones, we want the healing now!!!  I know I do!  The Lord assured me that your sickness would not end in death (John 11:4), but will glorify Him.  I will hang onto that Promise knowing I will see you again, touch you and celebrate while severing these strongholds afflicting our family.  I am sorry you’re hurting.  With my tears, this I pray with great expectation, in Jesus’ mighty name!

I love you… ♥♥

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