Tag Archives: #suicide

I’m A Party Just Waiting To Happen…

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I’m A Party Just Waiting To Happen!

All At Once I Came Alive…

Out of the shadows,

bound for the gallows

A dead man walking

till Love came calling.

Rise up!

Six feet under,

I thought it was over.

An answer to prayer,

the voice of a Savior…

Rise up!

All at once I came alive.

This beating heart, these open eyes.

The grave let go.

The darkness should have known,

You’re still rolling stones…”

 

I am my Beloved’s and He is more than mine!

My name is Tammy Ingram and I’m a party just waiting to happen!  Don’t believe me?  Come rejoice with me as we celebrate these truths through daily profession that are written in the Word of God about US (God’s chosen beloveds) and you’ll understand where my obnoxious optimism and joy comes from!

I’m a party just waiting to happen; filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy waiting to pop (1 Peter 1:8)!  Angels rejoice over me (Luke 15:10) as the demons flee in pure terror (James 4:7).  Ha!  Top that off, the Lord God Almighty Himself dances over me as He serenades me with His Love (Zephaniah 3:17).  You see, I am chosen by God (John 15:16) and this beloved not only has favor with man and understanding, but F-A-V-O-R with the Lord God Almighty (Luke 2:52).  Hello! 

I mean, I am called His Work of Art, His Masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10), after all.  Even before the creation of the world, I was planned and chosen (Ephesians 1:4).  I am always on my Lord’s mind and He thinks about me constantly (Psalms 139:17-18), which is probably why I’m considered the apple of His eye (Psalm 17:8). 

And no, God is N-O-T thinking about putting me in a straitjacket either! 

I lack no good thing (Psalm 34:10) and I was predestined for success by none other than the Lord God Almighty Himself (Romans 8:28-30).  I am placed and seated with God, a royal priesthood, chosen by God as His very own.  My value comes from being the KING’S daughter with royal blood running through my veins, part of His chosen generation, peculiar people we are (1 Peter 2:9), and NOT from my own achievements.

Meditating on these TRUTHS should be a part of our daily regimen and dance (worship).  Talk about a confidence builder, knowing where to run for safety and refuge and where to pick up and receive this treasure trove reminding us of our worth and value being God’s pursued child.  Speaking and prophesying God’s promises over our lives so we DO NOT BELIEVE the LIES of the enemy that so easily entangle us!

And as my fav Lisa Bevere said, “God has a way of taking every bad choice, every misstep and redeeming it, not just for our future, but for the benefit of others.”

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Look up, child!  God’s still rolling stones… 

You might start understanding where my joy comes from.  Stick around!  It won’t take long.  I can’t wait until you’re able to look into the mirror and see who God created: Beautiful You!

This is why I’ve decided to share and publish each week my commitment in reaching and teaching our amazing homeless beloveds this Bible study I’m writing called God’s Great Love Changes Everything!

Introducing the love of our Father through the magnificent works of the Holy Spirit’s transformation is simply believing and experiencing what the Bible says about us daily through application.  There’s so much love, contentment and healing to be experienced this side of heaven. 

Removing our veils of shame; acknowledging and believing who we were created to be is powerful; filled with joy, laughter and lots of celebratory dancing…

Celebrating Each Other

There’s no competition here.  This CEO considers the acronym CEO to mean Celebrating Each Other. 

I was once so tired trying to belong and fit in and be accepted anywhere and everywhere with whomever, I resolved to suicidal tendencies, even driving off a 350-foot cliff.  Nothing short of miraculous being alive today!  Trying to perform and conform to society’s standards just to be loved and accepted is exhausting, isn’t it?

This might help shed light on why I wrote Rejection Is Merely A Redirection last year.

We all just want to be loved, find where we fit in, you know, that place of belonging that says we’re enough just the way we are (beautiful enough, smart enough, sophisticated enough, loved enough), being seen and acknowledged that our lives do matter.  No judgment and/or condemnation here.  Blameless’ motto:  There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His Name!

Just ask my grown sons who are 26 and 33; they’ll agree, I’m one crazy Grammy Tammy!

Blameless Mama's Boys

Your life is a party waiting to happen!  We’re all in this together.  Nothing would make me happier than hearing you tap into these truths while living them out.  One blossoming, confident beloved!

If you follow us each week with your Bible, you’ll experience through laughter, sometimes even raw and candid vulnerability, transformation ushering in celebration as these truths become part of your own makeup.

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Until next time…

Thank You For Being…

Blameless A Beautiful You Event

Stopped Me Dead In My Tracks To Be God’s Hands And Feet

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Stopped Me Dead In My Tracks To Be God’s Hands And Feet

Today started like any other day.  Awakened with joy and gratitude, but dreading another long day being over committed.  Those last few moments of sleep cuddled around my pillow were screaming my name!  But the heightened enticement from the delicious morsels of more sleep lost their battle to sprint the hurdles of the ticking clock.

Appointments versus Being Present 

It’s hard to prioritize our lives when the clock ticks faster than each footstep.  I don’t glide like I used to.  Strength and speed have been replaced with substance and snap.  I long to master how to navigate the constant and rapid changes that occur with the snap, but I’m working on it.  Work in progress!

Once my prayers were finished and released, I made a flippant request to my Lord asking Him to show me somebody today that would stop me dead in my tracks who needed His love and affirmations to remind me of how desperate and alone I was 37 years ago that would trigger the mania to tragically end my life. 

It’s hard to share about depression through the loneliness and desperation when you can’t quite remember what that looked like.  Sure, I get depressed at times, we all do; but to be that desperate and all alone, that is something that required probing back into my underbellies.

I seem to forget to practice what I preach, because I sure would be a lot more selective in my prayers and petitions to the Lord.  I either fail to hear myself making these flippant requests on a maxed-out schedule as if I was emulating the Pharisees to look more holy or I arrogantly pour out prayers to make myself look better in front of God.  I mean, God knows our motives; so…

The day shifted and howled similar to the blazing north winds.  Upon exiting the medical center to leave behind the news that ushered me into frenzy, my mind occupied residency in the bad neighborhood.  That deadly hood needs barricading.

Due to being upset with the doctors and the shuffling of appointments that I was now late for, I failed to notice this man who shocked life back into me by jumping out of nowhere into the sidewalk before me.  The fright caused from being winded forced a pathetic screech and an accompanying tinkle as I soon realized lingering in the hood is far more dangerous than any mortal.

Epiphany versus Revelation

This mortal man’s name was William.  Yes, I flippantly prayed in the morning that the Lord would show me somebody who needed His love.  I almost missed out on God’s answer to that prayer because I was too busy being focused on all the demands and unknowns and how could I possibly prioritize my time to not upset others.

Herein lies William who is 28 years old.  He just got released from the hospital after overdosing on Meth.  He knew God could hold him through recovery, but just couldn’t gather up the strength to walk away from the comforts of his drug of choice.  My heart broke because his life matters, for one; and second of all, he could have been any one of my kids.  He knew I cared, after initially pulling away from him because of fear and fright.

Time stopped.  The world didn’t, but the clock literally stopped ticking.  Nothing mattered except for being present.  We talked awhile.  I shared a little and he listened.  Then it changed to me listening to words that would unearth this desperation I once encountered.  He felt all alone.  Meth took away the sting of rejection.  He belonged and always had someone with Meth.  Meth always waited to pick him up.

He shared his prayers that morning to God and the gravity of them happening upon his release from the hospital.  He had nobody to pick him up because he didn’t want additional guilt or to burden the few who were lingering in his life.  He prayed that if one person stopped to talk to him and acknowledge his presence, he would not take his own life.  

Death versus Matter

The pain flooding his heart and the desperation in which he expressed himself unearthed emotions that laid dormant for decades.  I absorbed every last word.  Ocean tears ushered in an agreement that paved the way for William to walk through.  Uber was summoned to take him where his life mattered.  The care-packed resources included my cell number to keep in touch.

We prayed as we walked.  Meth addicts do not like to stand still.  They need to keep moving.  Time started clicking.  I released William back into the care of the Lord as hard as it was, but I trust the One who ordered this Divine appointment all due to prayer. 

The ease in being the hands and feet of God is so simple, but it requires being present; spiritually, emotionally and physically.  His Uber trip cost me a whole $8.80 and his life is priceless.  Sometimes God has to literally drop people right in front of us because we’re too consumed with stress or worry.  That’s why the Lord tells us not to worry about tomorrow, for today has enough troubles of its own (Matthew 6:25-34).

I will say I don’t know what’s going to happen to William.  All appointments were fulfilled; Divine and scheduled.  I stuttered, but surrendered.  I felt awkward and was uncomfortable.  I did share the love of the Lord and William graciously received it as he grabbed a hold of the hand extending down from heaven.  Being the hands and feet of God shifted my life.  William texted me and said “thank you.”

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Masterpiece and Work in progress