I Just Washed My Hair and I Can’t Do A THING With It!

It’s Hard Being Me!

For Girls Only

What was I thinking???  I succumbed to the pressures of his relentless requests.  Between his text messages, phone calls, church attendance and his random notes tied around bouquets of roses (which stole my heart ♥♥), I don’t know if I was feeding into his vanity with my polite attentiveness or allowing his tenacity to usher in a one-up.

Honestly, I have not been out on a “real date” in over ten years and I was more than comfortable with that.  My picker had malfunctioned and led me down a path of heartache in the past, but you’ve got to give a girl credit for risking everything for love a couple of times, right?  Especially with her rejection record.  Talk about courage and strength!

And no, don’t ask me who it was.  For my eyes only!  I will share, he was indeed a tall, dark drink of water who wears a uniform sometimes 24 hours a day!  Oh, my palpitating heart! 

Ha!  That could mean anyone from First Responders to UPS drivers.  I’m bad, I know…  A girl’s got to keep SOME secrets, you know!

Oh, and in case you are still trying to figure it out, don’t forget that seasonal shopping is upon us and Santa Claus wears his uniform 24/7!

I’m so bad…  And I’m loving every minute of it!!!  My blog has been way too serious.  Now it’s time to have some fun and be me!

Life is and should be a box of chocolates!

Normally whether I’m in court, doing chaplain work, barking at our INJUSTICE system or running around town, my look consists of a dress and long blonde hair.  In court the suit wins, but around town, the long hair tucked behind the ears is who Grammy Tammy is. 

Gotta keep a youthful appearance, right?  I like the easy-breezy side.

So getting ready for this long-awaited date with “the” tall, dark and very persistent handsome man should require a little extra prepping time getting ready, right?  Well, I showered and got ready like any typical day except I gave myself an extra 30 minutes to prepare for perfection. 

Oh my!  Fatal mistake number one.

Once I finished blow drying my hair, it looked amazing; never looked better.  It almost resembled a straight iron along with the soft curls.  Only us girls know what that looks like. 

So I got dressed and brushed my teeth for the last time.  Gotta have spearmint breath, right?  Yes, even us grandmas worry about that same stuff, girls; especially me!  It’s kind of an OCD thing with me. 

I glanced over at the clock and realized I had 40 minutes until I had to leave to meet my date.  Well, shoot, with that amount of time left over, I glanced at myself in the mirror and thought I could do better. 

So I brushed the hair out along with the curls and combed in the frizz.  I added some hairspray and low and behold, my beautiful perfection turned into a breeding, raging bird’s nest.

Come on, girls, we know what we do with our hair when we keep on messing with it?  Think about a silky, thin-haired blonde with hairspray and a back-comb; oh Lord, have mercy!  Can I hear the screams from a bird’s nest?

Blameless Bad Hair 7

Do I hear a meltdown?  Yep, you got it!  Oh, it was so much more.  Not even a bottle of Jesus Juice (wine) could have taken away the sting from the pain that I saw looking back at me.

And now the clock strikes past and I am late…

What’s a girl to do when meltdowns ensue all in the name of love and vanity?  She throws the hair behind the ears instead of up in a tight bun and dashes out the door leaving behind a trail of tears.

Now we welcome the Gene Simmons’ look from Kiss, you know, the black racoon eyes.  Just beautiful!

Here God tells us in His Word that our beauty is to be adorned with the lasting beauty that is found in our hearts, filled with a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:3-4) and not the hair, makeup, jewelry and fine clothes that we put on and believe beautifies us.

God never said natural beauty was full of chaos and meltdowns.  This exit resembled more like ravens fleeing from a comfy nest!

After the meltdown and feeling less-than beautiful for my tall, dark drink of water, I rose to the occasion, bad hair day and all. 

Here my Romeo dared to be late (strike three) or he was hiding, sitting at the bar laughing his assets off as to how I looked with my bird’s nest and racoon eyes, and my mountain of irritation was at full bar. 

Once my Romeo announced his arrival, our eyes met, and the evening and chaos was met with anything but good times.  Our restaurant was surrounded with mirrors and every mirror was filled with an admirer:  Romeo and My Hair! 

My nest gave birth to the definition of Carly Simon’s song, “You’re So Vain.”

You walked into the party
Like you were walking onto a yacht.
Your hat strategically dipped below one eye
Your scarf, it was apricot.
You had one eye in the mirror
As you watched yourself go by.
And all the girls dreamed that they’d be your partner
They’d be your partner,

and

You’re so vain.
You probably think this song is about you
You’re so vain.
I’ll bet you think this song is about you
Don’t you?
Don’t you?

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

Advertisements

Find The Gold In Everyone! Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

 Blameless Gold

It’s Easier Than You Think!

He who seeks good finds goodwill,

but evil comes to him who searches for it.

Proverbs 11:27

Hello Beautiful!  I pray your heart is overflowing with joy and love this week as you saw how easy it is to be the hands and feet of God bridging the gap from last week’s challenge.  The simple random act of that little boy laying his life down creating a bridge so the little girl could walk over safely was eye opening, wasn’t it? 

Laying down one’s life is exactly what Jesus did for us and can be mirrored when clothing ourselves daily with courage and kindness.  It’s that time again; it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

Why is it so hard for us Beloveds to encourage, inspire and compliment one another and even be the recipients of such blessings?  Why do we push these gifts away while being suspect of motive?  It appears we’ve become more concerned with spending exhaustive amounts of time looking for the dirt in others instead of seeing the golden nuggets that they are.

If we clothe ourselves daily with compassion and human kindness, we won’t have to look very far or even closeup to see the gold in other beloveds.  Encouragement through compliments and support is something we all desire and need on a daily basis and yet, it is becoming suspect when one chooses to speak words of affirmation.

I love to spend time meditating on the Word because I need daily (more like minute by minute) inspiration and guidance so the Lord can spread His umbrella of protection around my heart.  I’m a Beloved just like the rest of us who can turn at a moment’s notice and hiss at others while allowing my attitude to destroy and tear down others instead of building them up.

My jolts of joy need building and that takes a lot of time with my Lord.  When I leave His presence, I am filled with His Love knowing I am precious in His sight, I am His masterpiece, and I was designed meticulously with unique qualities that no one else has or could offer, so I leave feeling refreshed, restored and beautiful.  With this blanket of love and confidence, I get to change the atmosphere and do so by identifying all beloveds as Beautiful. 

I mean, come on, who doesn’t want to be addressed and affirmed as beautiful, right?  I know I can never hear it enough.  And since I’m single, that means I need a double dose of being called beautiful so I can absorb and reciprocate it with the spreading of love. 

People that know me or have met me embrace the gift that they’re going to be referred to as beautiful whether they like it or not.  This includes whether I am walking into a meeting, church, or even at my doctor’s office.  I try to sprinkle love by welcoming beloveds with a smile and the greeting of “Hi Beautiful!” 

We’re in a culture and society now where the fertile soil is ripe for receiving seeds of encouragement and love which will blossom into beauty through the depositing and cultivation of celebration.  This can be done through the power of words.

What is sad, though, with all the darkness and division today, rarely do beloveds get to hear building words of inspiration from a stranger or even their friends and family that they’re considered beautiful.

Why are we suspect when someone calls us beautiful?  Why do we feel uncomfortable and almost awkward when receiving not only the Truths about ourselves, but positive reinforcement as to who God designed us to be?

I will admit, some of the initial reactions from Beloveds are quite comical.  When I say hello for the first time saying, “Hi Beautiful, how are you,” they look confused and perplexed.  They have even become somewhat suspicious or awkward by such a greeting.  You would think I had leprosy or was some weirdo dangling a you’re-being-robbed note by their expressions initially, but then that fear turns into a beautiful softening of their aura.

giphy2

We need more of God’s outpouring of Love to blanket others especially when being referred to as beautiful creates fear.  I don’t know about you, but when we feel treasured and pursued, the world becomes a more beautiful place and we’re able to radiate His Love and change the atmosphere.  Being told we’re beautiful changes everything!

Can you imagine a world where beloveds are running around and engaging with one another confident?  How about even celebrating each others’ lives as beautiful?  Talk about powerful.  The comparing, the competing, and the criticizing could be turned into supporting, celebrating and encouragement instead.  Now that’s a beautiful world!

Blameless Proverbs 11.27

Weekly challenge:   Let’s challenge ourselves to be an inspiration to ALL BELOVEDS we cross paths with this week by identifying them as “Beautiful.”  Let’s encourage each other with words of Truth, words of praise, words of encouragement and support.  Let’s shock and change the atmosphere everywhere we go.  This domino effect will usher the world into the presence of what the kingdom of God is like this side of heaven wherever that love travels to.  That’s an easy bridge to construct, all in the name of Love.

Where’s the love?  Let your words release the brightness of the Lord and let it fly. 

giphy3

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

The Eyes Tell A Story More Powerful Than The Tongue!

Blameless Life

Do Our Eyes Reflect Spiritual Light Or Darkness?

The eye is the lamp of the body.  If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light (Matthew 6:22). 

I was feeling sassy and playful.  Confidence oozed from my pores.  I finally had that skip back in my step.  I had allowed discouragement and what I perceived as “defeat” to rob me of my strength and joy.  But my eyes were screaming, “I’m back…”

I thrive pursuing a blameless life emanating joy because I love my Lord who gives me comfort and courage, but attack my character and/or a loved one’s, that temptation to leap and pounce on the prey that stands before me becomes my greatest sin and battlefield.

This Beloved was graciously rewarded with joy that could not be contained.  The intensity when God stretches your faith and trust by using you as His vessel to shake up an evil and corrupt justice system is hard not to rejoice and celebrate over.  Vengeance belongs to the Lord!  But… the containment found in the eyes tells the story of a longing fulfilled. 

Our hearts mirror our souls and are reflected by our thoughts and what we see and hear!

We have to protect what we see and hear daily and what we allow into our lives.  Sometimes we don’t have that choice and that can usher adverse effects on the condition of our souls.  When we have a growing, intimate relationship with Jesus, our eyes are more radiant because they’re fixated on Him and not our problems.  When we become discouraged and defeated, that glow and twinkling loses its brilliance.  As hard as we try to hide our feelings, we forget how our eyes speak with their own language. 

Can we say animated???  You bet!  Daggers…  Venom…  Deadly…

Seriously though, I was skipping merrily along with jolts of joy because the Lord took victory in using the weak (me, me, me) to take down the strong (usurping authority).  I was radiating confidence that this wounded warrior only dared to dream about (1 Corinthians 1:27). 

So now when God ushers me into situations that are way over my head and expertise and full of fear, I won’t freak out as bad because I have this faith-building deliverance that strengthened my faith.

A person’s thoughts are discovered and exposed by examining the eyes!

Let’s face it, when we’re upset, our eyes are a dead giveaway.  We don’t need to open our mouths.  There is more fire and toxicity than light.  Have you ever looked in the eyes of a person filled with rage?  I sure have.  Let me share, it is frightening.  All you see is a blank stare filled with death and glazed-over fire.  There is no flicker of life in those eyes.  When you encounter a person filled with joy and the love of the Lord, their eyes twinkle and radiate their soul’s health.

I used to struggle focusing on the Lord when I lived in darkness filled with fear, despair and depression.  Life can be really hard at times, but until I claimed and received the Lord’s outpouring of Love that permeated my heart, His light could not be radiated.  It is up to me now to keep the rekindling process alive so I can thrive and not just survive.

Blameless Beauty of a Woman

The true beauty of a Beloved is seen through her eyes!

I don’t know anyone that would enjoy spending time in the presence of a beautiful woman with hate in her heart and eyes filled with darkness.  The true beauty of a Beloved is seen through her eyes and how she makes others feel!

Have you ever noticed the person you were talking with seemed to have a twinkle in their eyes when they were talking?  Maybe there were tears overflowing from the ducts of their eyes or a redness that shadowed the whites of their eyes.  Paulo Coelho wrote, “The eyes are the mirror of the soul and reflect everything that seems to be hidden; and like a mirror, they also reflect the person looking into them.”

I want my eyes to project the strength of my soul.  That doesn’t mean they won’t gush tears from the sorrow of my soul from time to time, but I want them to radiate my soul’s beauty and strength that is found within the eye’s twinkling.

Always pray to have eyes that see the best, a heart that forgives the worst, a mind that forgets the bad, and a soul that never loses faith!

When people look into your eyes, do they see life or death?  When you speak, do your eyes twinkle with sincerity and excitement or do they radiate judgment and darkness?  Our eyes speak louder than anything that could flow from our mouths, filtered or not.

When life takes me through turbulent storms, I want immediate relief and an umbrella of protection.  When the waves are constantly pounding me up against the rocks in the raging sea and I find myself struggling not to go under, my soul clings to:

You Are Much Stronger Than The Storm!

Faith and trust enables us to see through the Lens of Love Himself with no borders and/or boundaries leading us to sojourn confidently while taking risks and living in peace that surpasses all knowledge.  What story do your eyes show?

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

Clothing Ourselves With Compassion and Human Kindness!

giphy

Our World Needs Us Dressed and Ready To Bridge The Gap With Love and Human Kindness! 

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hello Beautiful!  I pray you are embracing this week realizing just how beautiful you are along with being blessed.  After all the tragedy that has developed around the world these past few months between the riots, terrorism attacks, earthquakes, raging fires and the destructive hurricanes, there are a lot of hurting and down-and-out beloveds that areBlameless Blossoms True Beauty Within suffering and in great need of some human kindness.  If we could only remember that living in peace blossoms the true beauty within, we would be reminded how important it is to get dressed daily in God’s Great Love.  It’s that time again, it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

Admittedly, last week I was full of woe and worry.  This week I am filled with gratitude and determination to make a difference in the lives of so many hurting beloveds.  I was fortunate enough to come through all of these natural disasters unscathed, but I have many friends who were on the receiving end to all of this destruction and were wiped out completely.

Where do you go or even start to clean up when the whereabouts of the front door to your home is nowhere to be found or it’s buried beneath six feet of water?  Talk about overwhelming.  Many don’t even know how to start cleaning up because of the emotional layers filled with turmoil, much less not having the necessary means to maintain sanitary conditions like clean and running potable water and electricity to make the environment habitable.

Colossians 3:12 reminds us to start each day as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothed with compassion and kindness, to name just a few.  The only way we can be dressed with compassion and kindness is to layer these virtues with His Great Love.  Love holds these virtues into place like glue.  When we let Love guide our life, the peace of Christ will rule in our tender hearts. 

So in order to eliminate the terrible duo of fear and loss, how about we work together in being kind and compassionate.  A few ways to promote compassion can be:

  1. Start with Yourself (focus on your strengths and positive qualities first).
  2. Communicate Verbally and Non-verbally (eye contact, body inward, and listen).
  3. Touch (a gentle touch goes a long way.  If appropriate, a hug or shoulder tap).
  4. Encourage Others (positive reinforcement and praise).
  5. Express Yourself (nodding, tears, laughter, and a sincere smile go a long way).
  6. Show Kindness (expecting nothing in return).
  7. Respect Privacy (no gossiping and respect personal space).
  8. Learn How To Advocate (speak up and defend others’ rights).
  9. Volunteer (help in cleanup, babysit, running errands, making phone calls).
  10. Consider your words carefully (think before you speak, empathize, a loving attitude).

Love Holds Compassion and Kindness In Place

Without love, none of this can be accomplished.  God’s kind of love is not a feeling, it’s an action that moves forward.  God’s Great Love is selfless, requiring to love whether we feel like it or not.  Where there’s anger, a sign of love is to show compassion.  Where there is malice, kindness shows the love that exists in our hearts. 

Let Love Guide Our Lives

Let’s start letting love guide our lives.  Laying down one’s life to act as a bridge so another beloved who is filled with fear can walk safely over to the other side is where the love is at.  That’s what Jesus would do and did for us.

Weekly challenge:  Let’s be proactive by getting and staying involved in the needs that are overwhelming other beloveds in our world today where we can step in and help with.  Whether we’re on the east coast or west coast, strong bridges can be built through love.  Whether it’s a small monetary donation, a prayer, a sincere smile, a listening ear, dropping off water and groceries, doing research or even someone who joyfully changes the atmosphere wherever they go by pouring out the Love that only us Beautiful Beloveds can radiate.  Together, one by one, piece by piece, we can make our world beautiful again!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Is Clamoring For Attention Worth Turning You Into A Zombie?

It’s a Cat Fight and It’s Bloody!

The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few (Matthew 9:37).  If this is the case, why are so many of us Christians turning into zombies ushering us into pathetic cat fights that stampede other beloveds all in the name of competition? 

This competition is ugly and it clouds over the glory of our Lord.  It resembles more of a beat-up, scary soul.

There are so many souls just waiting to give their lives over to the Lord and become part of the body of Christ, but they need joyful and merciful beloveds to guide them. 

Having a zombie-like appearance and/or competitive spirit detracts beloveds from comfortably entering and engaging in a relationship with Jesus Christ.

Where’s the love and joy that welcomes and encourages the radiance of God’s glory?  Are our zombie-like appearances detracting others from engaging in the body of Christ or is it the clamoring for attention that makes others sprint from the church?

I know all too well what it is like to serve until I collapse.  I love people and there’s nothing more that warms my heart than meeting the needs of others, but sometimes it becomes too much and I need to check my motives before burnout develops.

There’s nothing wrong with setting boundaries and alerting others that the demands are robbing us of our joy.  When our service is guilt-driven instead of our cup overflowing with grace, that’s when the Spirit is announcing it’s time that we need refreshment and restoration ourselves.

I know we worry about letting others down, or we will relinquish being perceived as a leader, or that our leaders will turn their backs on us after our sabbatical.  Trust me, there are plenty of organizations needing volunteers where you will be received with great love, acceptance and acknowledgment.

There’s nothing worse when you enter a congregation filled with burned-out leaders that walk around resembling zombies.  Where’s the joy and excitement coming together?  They may look your way; but they look through you, not at you.  They throw out a forced smile and can’t wait until the service is over so they can literally rush out.

Where’s the love that takes the time to engage in a relationship or even remembers your name?

If only we could remember that our position or title does not indicate our worth or value; instead, God will be able to utilize our beautiful selves in changing the atmosphere somewhere else or usher us into a completely new area created just for our unique gifts. 

The Lord mentioned that the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few, because He was announcing there would ALWAYS BE plenty of positions available.  God’s always hiring!

Are we more interested in the labels and titles that puff up our egos that announce we belong and have power or are the job responsibilities in being a servant too demanding? 

Better yet, as we knock out other beloveds in order to be a part of the pastoral clique, have we once thought about the responsibility and commitment that is needed to undertake and fulfill these highly competitive roles in the church?  Everyone wants to be a part of the leadership in our churches, but they don’t want to do the work.

As a concerned beloved pointed out, “Have you noticed how the church is full of beloveds clamoring for attention in their feat of competition?” 

Beloved, there’s plenty of positions available.  We need to be conscience of the fact that we’re not glorifying our Lord when we’re overwhelmed with commitments and just going through the motion resembling zombies gnashing our teeth rather than the radiant beloveds full of joy and grace.

That’s scary stuff.  Who would want to come inside?  I sure wouldn’t!

Funny thing about climbing the ladder in the church, God has thousands upon thousands of jobs just laying vacant with unlimited perks and great blessings…

No need for a cat fight.  We don’t have to shun or belittle another because we fear they will take our position or push us out of ours… 

There’s a whole world outside of our congregation’s four walls that wants and needs to be loved on.  I’m asking the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into His harvest. 

I’m just trying to be a vessel myself that pours much-needed love and encouragement into others’ lives; that’s my gift and something I offer freely.

Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field (Matthew 9:38).

Let’s stop trampling others.  I don’t know who let the animals out, but maybe we could run our race more victoriously after we undergo a heart transplant before we stampede and take others out. 

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

When A Mama’s Heart Is Broken

When A Mama’s Heart Is Broken! 

Don’t You Ever Touch My Son!

 

All I can do today besides cry and pray is to blog:  “Don’t you EVER touch my son!” 

And I mean ever…  Ever again…  NEVER!!!  And may I repeat, EVER AGAIN!

When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!  And that’s an understatement.  Don’t ever cross paths or get in the way of a mama bear protecting her young.  Only a mother’s love can shield her young.  And that “young” includes grown men, too.  To this mama, he’ll forever be my baby boy. 

My heart is broken and filled with justifiable anger.  Why do people slander others?  You either need Jesus or a job; probably both!

Words from another are maliciously and methodically attacking my child.  Why do people insist on talking about others and acting like gossip is an acceptable thing to do?  If you even knew my son, which you don’t, you would never speak such ill words.

Gossip is destructive and even more powerful than any nuclear war or tsunami could deliver in wiping out a nation much sooner than any national disaster could. 

The words spoken from our mouths reveal our faith!

Precious beloveds, there is already way too much devastation in this world.  People need more love, not hate.  My God, take those torturous daggers and flaming arrows and throw them in the pit of hell.  The fruit of Thy Mouth loudly announces your faith.  Fruit produces L-O-V-E!!! 

Beloved, you are hurting my Lord.  It’s obvious that your heart needs healing.  Please stop justifying non-believers’ opinions as to why they want nothing to do with Christianity!

Gossip hurts.  My son needs support and love, not the lies that are pouring out of your mouth.  Where’s the love?

Why do some Christians believe that gossip is not a sin and totally acceptable and forget that its penalties carry the same as adultery and murder?

I lean heavily on what the Bible says especially when it emphasizes the rarity in sharing what God hates.  Proverbs 6:16-19 says:

There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies, and a person who stirs up conflict in the community. 

Please write these words on the tablet of your heart because you are fulfilling all but one that God hates through your gossip.  All you’re doing is hurting my Lord and my son who has received enough destructive comments.

You can talk about me all you want because what you think of me does not change who I am, nor what I was called to do, or where my worth and value derive from.  I am loved and a daughter of the King of kings with royal blood running through my veins.  You cannot change that no matter how hard you try.

But… when it’s regarding my sons, this just confirms the fact as to why people want nothing to do with Jesus and those of us who radiate His Great Love.  Stop!  You’re giving my Lord a bad wrap and His Love took enough of a horrific and torturous death for our sins. 

Piss me off, but remember what Jesus said in Matthew 7:21 about walking out our faith:

Not everyone who says to me, “Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.  Many will say to me on that day, Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?  Then I will tell them plainly:

I never knew you.  Away from me, you evildoers!

God does not will hate or gossip.  Quite the contrary!  God wills love!  Maybe you could start utilizing your energy by praying and asking our Lord for His forgiveness and learn from Jesus how you can build up others instead of tearing them down.  Your words are hurtful and full of lies. 

Since you are attacking my child, obviously you have a problem with me because you’re still talking about us.  If I did something to you, let’s talk so you can find peace and quit tarnishing someone who is already dealing with enough tragedy.

I pray you will take that “extra time” that you have and read what the Word actually says.  I am choosing to believe that you just do not know Jesus like you proclaim looking down that rather long nose of yours!

Living out our faith requires humility, patience and being trained up and equipped.  Others will know that we love Jesus and are His disciples simply by our love for one another (John 13:35) while forgiving others for the words that flow from their mouths and actions.  Love does not include back-biting and gossiping and being involved where we have no place, nor belong.  Jesus’ disciples mirror love like He did. 

God gives.  God gave us Jesus as an outpouring of His Love and His beloveds follow His example.  Let’s pour out love into others’ lives.  Being poured out is not taking away or stripping another of their dignity and self-worth.  Words are powerful and should not be used as a weapon.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

 

Threesomes Are Never Okay! Ask Hagar and Sarah!

Blameless Pulling A You

Shame Leaves You Feeling Utterly Alone and Forsaken!

Genesis 16

As the beautiful nurse attempted another I.V., she said, “Hey, you’re a chaplain, right?”  My reply, “Well, once a chaplain, always a chaplain, I guess,” not knowing where she was going. 

As she slammed the needle into my vein, she inquired rather nonchalantly, “It’s okay to give my man a threesome for his birthday, right?”

I nervously laughed and replied, “I know I’m a hard prick, but you almost made me pee my pants.” 

Then nothing but still silence

Can I hear awkward? 

It gets worse.

She wasn’t kidding either!

She continued, “I’m serious.  I mean, he’s my husband and in the old days men had many wives.  I’m kind of bi-curious anyways, so…”

Bi-curious???

I looked both ways, expecting my medical team to come out and scream, “Surprise!  You should have seen your face.”  They didn’t, and she was dead serious. 

God tells us to be ready and know what His Word says in and out of season, but this upset me.  Where’s our moral compass?  I’m trying not to judge here.

All I could do was grumble underneath my breath for God to give me “wisdom.” 

I shared how hard it was on me when my husband had numerous affairs and the damaging effects it had on our marriage and children along with sharing the lasting effects that the threesome related in Genesis 16 delivered. 

Threesomes are never okay.  Besides the obvious reasons, when a man is with another woman, a scornful woman generally retaliates!  You can’t run from the effects; just ask Hagar and Sarah.  It led to shame and feelings of despair for all parties, not to mention the cursing onto future generations!

Sarah’s friends got on the bandwagon by mocking Sarah for having a barren womb that was considered a disgrace in those days and encouraged her to fulfill this void, this “promised” descendant through another woman.  This lure prompted Sarah to take matters into her own hands and forego waiting on God’s timetable.  She reacted by seeking out another woman into her marriage bed.

Who needs friends like that???

As my friends know all too well, I may be wounded and joyful and can relate with the best because of it, but there are times that what flows out from my mouth needs some filtering, and in a girlie kind-of-silly way!  Just don’t let a tall, dark drink of water walk by.  I may be old, but I am far from dead!

Anyhoo…  Truth be told, with the selfish, spoiled brat side that is constantly at war with the loving and gracious side of me, I was at a loss for words.  Shock turned into embarrassment and then I became flustered which led me agitated with my medical team prompting my snap.

Do you get that way?  Please tell me you do.

As of late, with being overdue for my Florida vaycay that seems to constantly be pushed off, it appears I’m having more and more of those days where even the slightest squeak of a mouse sets me off. 

With my mind bouncing and spinning, spending way too much time occupying the wrong hood (bad neighborhood mindset), the exhaustion is setting in and the demands vying for my attention are making me feel more like I need an exorcism performed than the much-needed rest.

Normally I would scream and get on top of a chair when encountering the tiny varmint, but right now since I’m in THAT MOOD, I am ready to get down on my hands and knees and go whisker to whisker with these dirty little rats who appear to be having way too much fun!

Why when we get in a funk, in that lonesome place, where we hide underneath our covers or isolate behind closed doors engaging in our own pity parties, feeling like we’re not good enough or even loved, do we run away from our problems instead of facing them head on all because of Master Guilt and Shame?  We want to be validated, but…

Maybe it’s because we intervene and run ahead of God’s timetable like Sarah and Abraham because we’re such control freaks.  We forget to trust and call out to the One who knows exactly what we’re thinking (scary!) and loves us just the way we are and FORGIVES! 

We have a good, good Father; the One who loves us and promises never to leave or forsake us.  He cherishes us, even gets jealous for us as He chases us down just to pour love into our depleted and dry bones.  He understands our mistakes and needy minds that are in search of the Living One who sees us. 

Wanting a threesome is similar to what Hagar and Sarah did.  After the fact, their void and rushing ahead of God’s timetable turned into being ashamed, despised and rejected due to their actions while they both pointed the finger at others for the subsequent repercussions. 

Hagar ran away and hid while partaking in a pity party.  But God saw her and her pain and He received her.  The desperation in being a substitute wife; talk about shame!

We all run ahead and give up on God’s timetable from time to time when it doesn’t appear He is working or fast enough or when life seems dull.

If you think giving your husband over to another woman to conceive an heir is going to tap into God’s promises while proving your girlfriends wrong, you need a couple of Xanax and a couple of beers partying with the mice! 

Sarah strikes out and blames Abraham for succumbing to peer pressure and the subsequent mess instead of humbly accepting her involvement in prompting this mess.  She even proclaims, “You are responsible for the wrong I am suffering.  I put my servant in your arms, and now that she knows she is pregnant, she despises me” (Genesis 16:5). 

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

There’s No Place Like Home! Heavy-Hearted Days

Blameless No Place Like Home

There’s No Place Like Home!

Heavy-Hearted Days

1 Peter 1:6-9

“In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.  These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”

 God Bless Texas!

There’s no place like home…  There’s no place like home… 

No matter how hard or how many times you click your heels (or cowboy boots), that yellow brick road will lead you home.  It won’t happen fast enough, nor be quite like the one you’ve had to flee from (I’m so sorry), but your journey filled with faith will lead you home.

Tears flow uncontrollably as I sit back and ponder a life well-weathered.  As I try to separate myself from the tragedies of the storm-ravaged Texas, the amazing Houstonians remind me of the great hope and faith this California girl fell in love with and what the Texan community offers.  Especially in tragedy!

We have to applaud the compassionate pursuit of the beloveds coming together rescuing one another during their own tragedy filled with shock and dismay.  Their lookout on the flooded horizon promises only what the Lord could deliver; that they may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ (Ephesians 3:18).

Where’s The Love? 

The Houston Way!

These people have lost everything.  Yet their focus relies on the journey, not “what was.”  They may be rescued from the flooding waters overcoming their homes, but this flooding only directs them to a place of unknowns filled with temporary provisions requiring possibly sleeping on cement floors alongside of total strangers where food and water is scarce.  This emulates homelessness, doesn’t it, lacking expected provision?

Yet their testimony and attitude embodies gratitude and grace that we all can learn from and mirror.  They don’t complain about the slim provision or carry anger filled with resentful hearts.  They are grateful for the moment and the safety of refuge.  They have no idea where they’re being led.  They just know they have to trust the leading from those who are being utilized as God’s hands and feet. 

And with alligators and snakes seeking refuge right alongside of them, we have to applaud and praise God for those masquerading angels that are aiding in the relief efforts as the flooding continues.  But will hysteria develop as shelters become overwhelmed with maximum capacity and limited resources leaving them scrambling?

Blameless Alligator

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear (Psalm 46:1). 

Fear…  Fear is a torturing juggling act!  To not fear is especially hard to remember when we’re suffering under cataclysmic conditions with no time to process along with not knowing what tomorrow offers.  When tragedy strikes and you lose your home, your valuables, your vehicle, your job, your connections, your normal mundane schedule, not to mention how you’re going to feed and care for your children and pets, and losing your life-line phone charger (hello!), the emotional storm capsizes the very vehicle of protection in the middle of this raging sea.

I have walked through these fears of the unknown with living in a temporary shelter for protection along with my children and let me share, it is HELL!  While you are still processing the shock, you are grateful for the roof over your head, but being sandwiched between the protection from the elements and the people leading the way that YOU DO NOT KNOW or TRUST, leaves little room for sweetness in-between wading through great loss.

Between the lack of privacy, personal space, co-ed restrooms, much less the freedom to shower to purge the remnants of evacuation, humidity, lack of running water, let alone essential feminine hygiene products that are usually at our disposal, strips away each and every layer of pride head-on. 

Being thrust into having to trust and rely on others with the same heart and motives that we do requires total faith and commitment that will usher and protect us during the unknown.  It’s imperative that we walk by faith and not by sight, but how do we trust God with all our Blameless Giantshearts and souls during a time that we are forced to face these scary giants in our lives?

Will we believe these giants are blessings reaching down from heaven or will our exhausted and wrecked hearts believe they’re the enemy coming solely to steal, kill and destroy? 

These beloveds right now are praising God because they’re being rescued from their flooded homes.  They rejoice because they have been reunited with their families.  They don’t know where they’re going to go next, nor do they know how they’re going to find the provision to get them to their respective jobs or where they’re going to be living next week.  Now, that’s a faithful servant requiring great faith.

We would bode well to pray and honor these beloveds through donations of any size to those who have lost everything.  They’re living out their lives during this tragedy with the whole world watching them.  They deserve support and encouragement.  These beloveds are testifying to what trials filled with desperation, extreme loss, faith and unity delivers:  V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!

When our lives and provision feel hopeless and depleted, feeling they’re falling apart, even though it’s easier said than done, we need to remember that our lives are falling into place somehow and some way.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Beautiful You

.

Faith vs. Fear? Faith The Fear!

blameless-jail-3

Faith vs. Fear?

Faith the Fear!

“The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me.  Everyone abandoned me.  May it not be counted against them.  But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength…”  2 Timothy 4:16-17 NLT

 

Inmates!  When you think of this infamous title, what comes to mind?  Losers?  Prisoners?  Convicts?  Rejects deserving punishment? 

Better yet, what comes to mind when you hear of excessive force being used by correctional officers along with inmates’ Constitutional rights being violated? 

Who cares?  Hmmmm…

Anyone that knows me or has been following my blog for even a little while knows about my 110% complete devotion and support for ALL of our men and women in blue who have taken an oath and who selflessly sacrifice their lives to help protect and serve their communities. 

Okay, most of them anyways…  There’s always going to be a rotten apple in the barrel that infects and spoils the good ones.  Enough said!  I was married to a dirty cop so I know how that story goes…

That one bad apple didn’t stop me from going through the law enforcement chaplaincy academy after the fact and even serving as a chaplain for the past seven years, nor did being a victim of heinous crimes myself hinder my advocacy work and passion for the rejected and unloved. 

But when a beloved son finds himself in mayhem, I became sandwiched between our justice system and this corrupted force by witnessing firsthand violation after violation causing pain and turmoil to this mama’s child and others by the COs (correctional officers) not following the laws and the rules demanded by our U.S. Constitution.

Where’s the love in this world anymore?  We have become bullies hiding behind the power given to us through lack of governance, social media and our computer screens.  We have become fixated and thrive on corruption and crime and “colluding” and even become energized by real-life drama.  Talk about egotistical people without a moral compass.

When our three-year-olds are more familiar with the word “collude” instead of “loved,” we need to take a step back and examine how we are allowing the actions of others to influence our lives.  This includes how we utilize social media to peek, watch, stalk, gossip and even “date others” which is nothing more hazardous than to one’s “selfie.”

What happened to the meeting of minds face to face and loving our neighbors as ourselves?  Would you protect yourself by letting another brother be blamed for the fall?  If a child was getting hurt, would you intervene to protect them or would you click Facebook first and turn your video on and record instead of protecting them?

Every person is a child to some mother or father, so…  

What if this person was sitting in county jail awaiting trial; considered innocent until proven guilty, right?  Here he’s hurt, harassed, hazed, and even refused his Constitutional rights.  He’s put into a cell with another human’s feces on the walls.

Would you just ignore the inhumane discrimination because inmates are considered “losers” in jail or would you stand up for their rights and scream awareness against those who are abusing and usurping their authoritative powers?

This is frightening to come up against, but my God commands we work for justice.  Just because someone is in jail does not mean they’re dehumanized or any less of a Beloved.  God loves us all just the way we are, mistakes and all. 

These inmates have to do the time for their crimes, but between overcrowding, inhumane conditions, and being subjected to excessive force violates their Constitutional rights and it must be stopped.

What happens when you find yourself in the middle of Corruption versus Dedication?  Justice versus Usurping Authority?  Commitment versus Constitution?  Innocence versus Injustice?  Faith versus Fear?

I want to preface that I still stand behind law enforcement knowing full well there’s plenty of rotten apples, but when you find yourself having to go against some of those you once believed in and supported, the betrayal leaves you mad as hell with a passionate pursuit to end all this physical, emotional and spiritual harm. 

I had no idea advocacy meant I would find myself right smack in the middle of an exposed corruption ring within our correctional facilities through excessive force and inhumane conditions while a beloved child was at the core of just a minuscule part of it.

Between healing from surgery and going through further treatment alongside of this corruption case, writing is going to be sporadic and take a backseat as I fulfill my duties being a mom and an inmate advocate and making sure justice prevails.  There’s a mama’s heart that would love to react with my cast-iron horns fully emerged while spewing out flaming arrows, but…

I don’t know what emulating my Lord looks like exactly because each day there’s a new violation and I haven’t always reacted in a positive, loving manner with the COs with all of these emotions.  When your child is under the umbrella of abuse and injustice and his Constitutional rights have been violated again and again, you better believe I’m going to Faith the Fear boldly and courageously!  And I do not care WHO YOU ARE!

I am choosing to love my son mirroring the words penned from Paul in 2 Timothy 4:16-17.  I want him to feel the love of the Lord alongside of him through support, encouragement, visitation, phone calls, unconditional love and especially being an advocate demanding his due rights so he knows he’s not alone. 

Someone has to stand up for these inmates.  The system is slow and corrupt and families and friends dwindle away real quick.

I firmly believe hope replaces discouragement while trust overcomes doubt because my God is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us (Ephesians 3:20).  That’s being His hands and feet!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Beautiful You Bouquet 2

Two Are Better Than One… Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Blameless True Friends 1

Two are better than One,

because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
    his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
    and has no one to help him u
p!

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hello Beautiful!  I hope you are having an amazing week realizing just how beautiful you are.  I pray you were able to rest in God’s grace and be cleansed by His lathering of love.  It’s amazing what refreshment does to a parched soul.  Living in peace blossoms the true beauty within.  It’s that time again, it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

God designed our lives for companionship, the need for others, not living in isolation and going at it alone.  Loneliness was never a part of God’s orchestration, instead He created the beauty found in intimacy with Him and one another.  We need each other!  Let’s challenge ourselves this week to be a true friend with childlike intentions.  Let’s share Blameless Blossoms True Beauty Withinour story with another Beloved the struggles we are feeling through the lens of Truth and Trust as we embrace this gift in what vulnerability offers while being raw and candid.  The healing that will come from this transparency will be liberating, but it will also bond you to the one you’re sharing with.

One thing I have learned by allowing my life to be completely exposed (and I’m talking about being totally naked here with nowhere to hide) through the transparency, rawness and complete vulnerability is we all struggle with insecurities, feelings of shame, defeat, fear, anxiety, depression, you name it!  We’re all imperfect beings living in an imperfect world so why hide behind our struggles of imperfections that are intended to help us grow and become even more radiant!  When we share our lives with another Beloved, it offers peace knowing someone else is shouldering the pain.  This is how God turns our ashes into beauty.  Living in peace blossoms the true beauty within!

When we open up our lives by sharing areas of weakness that are uncomfortable for us to talk about, it paves the way for God to bring healing and support needed to battle and conquer our darkness.  We are also blessing the other person we’re sharing with because if we are opening up our hearts, that expresses to the other person that they’re loved and worthy of trust.  When we share our lives and struggles with one another, it not only unlocks our fears and the suppressed pain, but it gives God the room to bring healing to that area we didn’t want touched, much less exposed. 

We need community and we need each other; that’s how God designed us.  Sharing our stories offers intimacy and it opens the window to see clearly through the lens of how God intended true friendships to be.  No matter how old we are, there is still a little girl residing within our tender hearts who wants to love and be loved and play.  

Seeing through the lens of a True Friend is acknowledging the need for others.  In fact, a true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes while others believe the smile you’re wearing!  Blameless True Friends 1This requires sharing the good, the bad and the ugly.  You’ll be blessing that other person by sharing your struggles because they’re probably going through similar trials themselves.  Trust is a treasure chest filled with golden nuggets. 

This is the beauty found in connections.  Sharing leads to trust.  Trust leads to healing.  Healing then brings peace and beauty out of the ashes.  True friends make our good days better, but they also offer strength to make the hard times lighter and easier through their love and support.  We just have to reach out and Be-Loved!

We all have hundreds of acquaintance-type friends between social media and through our own channels of networking.  We also have friends that have been in our lives for years, yet for whatever reason, the friendship remains on the superficial side without vulnerability because of past betrayal or through gossip and hurts.  Let’s embrace our friendships or even cultivate new ones enjoying the benefits of being a true friend first so we can get to a new level of deeper understanding and intimacy together.

After all, Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us: 

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
    his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
    and has no one to help him up!

Weekly Challenge:  Challenge yourself this week to reach out and share your story with a friend or a new friend and watch the bond of that transparency and vulnerability remove the veil of shame that you’ve been hiding behind.  When we share our hurts, others will share theirs as well.  There’s nothing in our lives worthy of shame to hide behind.  We have been redeemed and we are Beautiful Beloveds, royal heiresses to the kingdom of God.  Let’s claim what freedom being the real beautiful “us” offers.

There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name! 

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Basketful of Flowers 1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? Part 3

Blameless Live Laugh Love 1.1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

Part 3

Be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.   Ephesians 5:1-2 ~ Live, Laugh, Love

Today was the day I decided to take complete power back and away from my abusers by talking about it.  They no longer rule or have any power through their threats of shame over my heart.  I was hoping that the love found through healthy communication mirroring 1 Corinthians 13:4-13 in being patient and kind, keeping no record of wrongs while not being easily angered, would bring some sort of fresh resolution or even repentance through changed behavior, but…

Someone has to stop generational strongholds of abuse in order to bring justice.  That requires awareness of behaviors and COMMUNICATION as we faith the fear.  Investing precious time into our relationships not only shows love, but it also revives honor. 

This is why I love running to my Bible for guidance because I need calm over chaos.  I refuse to exist in that world anymore.  I want to be more like my loving Savior so I can learn to love better and forgive easier.  Ephesians 5:1-2 tells us to be imitators of God, as dearly loved children and live a life of love.  I choose to live this way the best I can because Love sees through the lens of Truth!  I choose to live, laugh and love much while others live in rage and bitterness.

Being imitators of God that Ephesians 4:29-32 states is hard.  It means to try not letting any unwholesome talk come out of our mouths (especially when we’re upset), but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen…Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Discounting a person’s voice is not only disrespectful, but where’s the love in that? 

Communication takes at least two voices, right?  Well, unless you’re living in the wounded warrior world, that world-of-one torment that engages in battle with thyself and rips your opponent apart in your mind and exhausts you like any real battle would!  All that does is exposes our hearts by holding us captive inBlameless Bee Kind 1 our cells of hell filled with nothing but rage and bitterness.  No wonder we’re angry people.  It also prohibits us from being present because we’re always present in the wrong neighborhood.

I’ll share an excerpt of what my last wounded warrior world was like next time!  It’s sad, but we also have to laugh at times at how we destroy ourselves and waste valuable energy.  Here the honey bees with the stingers say, “If we’re going to die, we’re taking you down with us.”  Who needs the enemy’s affliction; we destroy ourselves by cultivating the hurt that is brewing inside our hearts.  We need to be kind to ourselves.

My speaking coach/mentor challenged me to narrow my writing and speaking skills towards the passion that ignites me to work tirelessly starting up my nonprofit organization, Blameless and Forever Free Ministries.  My heart’s desire and hope is to help meet the needs of those who are hurting by building a bridge between church and state for the oppressed.

Being a survivor myself saved by nothing short of grace after decades of torment, it took me awhile to understand why I have such a gift of love for all beloveds and why forgiveness comes easily.  When you have been hurt much and forgiven much by Love Himself, it makes it easy to pour love into others and situations that need a covering of peace and inspiration.  Plus, I don’t want anyone to suffer all alone because all lives matter!

I have watched far too many Beloveds try and go at it alone and all they are doing by being shackled to shame and guilt is refusing the power that is available to them:  Freedom!  God Blameless Freedom Found in Exposuredid not design us for isolation to hide when we’re embarrassed and humiliated, He designed us to need others and to be seen.  We need the power of our friends’ strength to encourage us to the finish line.  There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name!

With this recent heartache of rejection and my failed attempts at reconciliation, the stinger was easily removed because I didn’t hide in isolation from this “supposed shame” being rejected and unloved; therefore, its infection was thwarted in spreading.  I knew I was loved by God and I needed the help of others to process sharing my heart or depression would have sunk in.  This vulnerability of exposure removed the stinger before it did more damage.  I bounced back rather quickly because my faith radiated who God says I am, along with walking alongside of girlfriends who helped open my eyes to see through the lens of Truth. 

Friendships pull stingers out and bring healing to the sting before its infection spreads through love and support.

I don’t know about you, but I can spend way too much energy judging myself more critically and harsher than any abuser while believing the lies of the enemy.  If only we could remember to spend our energy being the radiance of His Perfect Love!  God does promise us His blessings, but many of these gifts require our active obedience and participation.

This is where God unveils His destiny in bringing beauty from my ashes through His purpose and plan for my pain.  Now I get to love on others who are considered unlovable.  I get to be a voice for those who lost theirs through abuse and abandonment.  And now I’m honored to walk alongside of the masses who are walking through disease and death because I’ve walked victoriously through it myself.

Tasting and seeing the Lord is an invitation to experience the gift of His grace.  “I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.  Those who look to Him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame” (Psalm 34:4-5).  Today I’m living in freedom and flying free of yesterday’s guilt, today’s fears, and tomorrow’s grave.  All because God loves me just the way I am.

There’s something about freedom…  The purity of the innocence in letting go and yet the boldness in knowing your life matters!  We all want to know our lives matter.

Until next time..

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Freedom 2

Save

I Need A Bath! Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Blameless My Peace I Leave With You

I Need A Bath!

Tammy Tangent Tuesdays

Hello Beautiful!  I pray you’ve been having a blessed week filled with strength to keep pressing in along with a huge supply of patience sojourning this side of heaven.  It’s that time again; it’s Tammy Tangent Tuesdays!

I don’t know about you, but I’m filthy and stained!  I need daily cleansing.  I’m not as white as snow as I’d like to be.  I’ve been wallowing through the muck and yuck of mundane tasks on top of demanding peeps.  I need the purifying cleansing that only being bathed in God’s peace can accomplish! 

When we rest in His grace and are cleansed by His living waters, God bestows His Love that lathers up and washes away the filth that is clouding our lenses and keeping us in the wrong neighborhood (mindset).  Those little irritants can add up quickly when we allow them to brew inside our hearts.  It’s amazing how easy it is to become bitter and impatient, snapping on those who dare come within a few feet of us.

Bathing In His Love

God wants us to bathe in His peace as He lathers us with His Great Love, His grace and His tender mercies.  We would bode well if we made it a part of our daily regimen, bathing in His soothing waters of life and peace through prayer and time spent in His Word.  God wants to give us the simple pleasures of life, like bath time. 

Light a few candles and immerse yourself into how faithful God has been bringing you through the day or through the tough month.  Immerse yourself into these purifying waters and take a deep breath and reflect.  This is probably one of the hardest areas for us busy women to accomplish, but it’s so worth the discipline. 

One of the fruits of the spirit is self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).  This governs our decisions and lifestyle choices and attitudes.  This radiance is where we witness the changes in our character that emulate more of the life of Christ.  Rest is a weapon God uses to bless us with.

Blameless Bathtub

We can never forget that Rest is a weapon God blesses us with.  After all, even God rested after the sixth day of work.  The enemy hates when we rest because he wants us stressed out and preoccupied!

God was up to something unique when He added the element of rest to our lives.  If the Lord God Almighty rested on the seventh day (Genesis 2:2-3), that means His Beloveds need rest for restoration and reunification.  How else can we get refilled?  Goditude mindsets take discipline.  After all, we need solitude time to be still and snuggle in close to the Lord.  We can’t let ourselves feel guilty when we take our own time out!  There’s comfort found here, even Jesus took time out for solitude (Mark 1:35). 

This is why I love Ephesians 1:4, it reminds us of what God foreknew, For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight.  In love…”  There’s no way being holy and blameless can be accomplished when we’re overwhelmed and stressed out.

Needs are endless with the pulling and tugging on our time and hearts.  I am trying to be a Beloved that understands this need to practice the discipline of solitude.  Bathtubs help Beloveds push pause, so let’s take a bubble bath and get cleansed so the filth of our days and our exhausting journeys won’t rub off onto others! 

If we’re going to be radiant in a dirty and polluted world, we need self-control to be still and allow our minds to be renewed so we can walk in love.  As St. Augustine said, Love grows within us…“for love is the beauty of the soul.”

“Since love grows within you, so beauty grows.  For love is the beauty of the soul.”  St. Augustine

Weekly Challenge:  The Lord wants His Beloveds radiant.  Let’s make a lifetime discipline choice this week to allow ourselves 10, 15 minutes each day to become one with the Spirit in order to quiet our minds while washing away the filth of each day.  This will empower us with the ability to think His thoughts. 

Lord, we enter your presence with thanksgiving and praise.  We love you, Lord.  For your Love is good and endures forever.  We pray that you would refresh our bodies as you renew our strength.  As Beloveds, we yearn and crave to be restored.  We desire to be more like you and we thank you for the transformation taking place as You renew our minds.  Thank you for this quiet time of reflection as you awaken us to our need to be at rest while we’re still working this side of heaven.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Freedom 2

Save

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? Part 2

Blameless New Beginnings 1.1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next? 

Part 2

Violence, pain and suffering is predominant in the world today.  Why do children hate their parents?  Why do parents slaughter, use as weapons of mass destruction, or even sell and reject their own children?  How do wars between brother against brother and sister against sister ignite?  Where’s the love?

Hurt People Hurt Others

Jesus came to redeem our hurts, our lives, our families, by and through His blood which cost God so much.  I don’t know about you, but I’m in need of His daily transfusion of blood to cleanse my own soul and wash away my sins.

Needed:  Daily Blood Transfusions

Sadly, the world is full of sick, evil and hurt people whose hurts have never been worked through along with mental illness that has been swept underneath the rug for generations.  Instead of being diagnosed and treated, it has advanced into a full-fledged epidemic.  It’s tragic because there is no shame in having mental illness.  Anxiety, depression, addiction and eating disorders and rage are prevalent because they have been shamed for far too long.  This world may demand perfection, but as I say in my advocacy:

There is no shame in our game; Jesus is His name!

Being vulnerable where deep hurts are involved is more than uncomfortable, but I know there are many Beloveds who need to hear how God’s amazing grace sustained me so they can lean in and press through themselves.  It is hard when the world beats down on you Blameless Crown Tiarra 7making you feel insignificant and irrelevant, and you don’t know where to turn or even if you’re important enough to be seen or matter.  We all want to know we’re enough.

We can’t claim victory when we’re weaponless, have dull blades on our swords, so exhausted we can’t even see or think straight, not to mention when we’re starving and freezing cold.  This is where we get the option to either believe the lies of the enemy or allow God to pour out His Love into our depleted souls by tenderly affirming us.  The way He reaches down and coddles and comforts us next to His beating heart reassures us of our meaningful existence and His Great Love that is found in the beautiful pages of scripture.  I can’t advocate enough for the strength and peace received through peeling the pages of the Bible wide open.  Life literally pours out and ushers you into a relationship that offers freedom and acceptance!

When we’re wounded, even the slightest hiss will send us hiding!

God wants to wrap His everlasting arms around us tight until we slowly release our grip as we become aware and realize how loved and valued we are.  We are so cherished, God pursues our lives.  Us girls love to be pursued, don’t we?  I know I do!  He even serenades over us as He rejoices over our existence (Zephaniah 3:17).  I don’t know about you, but I have never been serenaded so the realization of this warms my tender heart and soul.

God designed us to need and be receptive to this kind of Great Love so we can realize where our worth and value derive from.  His Love is that good, fulfilling and rewarding.  And it never ceases.  There’s nothing we can do to lose His Love either.  For us Beloveds who have been rejected and abandoned, that is nourishment to feast on for our depleted souls. 

Seeing ourselves from God’s perspective opens the pathway of our hearts and knocks down the barriers of pride that hinders our confidence.  This way we don’t have to stay hidden, humiliated and ashamed because we were rejected, in our protective shells.  We can stand tall, with feet fitted firmly in the ground, knowing our worth and value.

This is why I constantly share why I go to the Bible first when in distress.  The Word is alive and active.  When I’ve been attacked, forsaken and rejected, thrown out as discarded leftovers, my heart is shattered.  I need guidance, grace, and reassuring tender mercies of love and worth thatBlameless Hebrews 4.12 (2) will help remind me and give clarity to who God says I am.  That is why the Bible is so powerful.

We can’t lose sight of the fact that hurt people hurt others.  Victims of heinous behaviors would be repeating the same thing to others if we didn’t have this loving and powerful Word of God to equip us with the ability to withstand the flaming arrows of the enemy along with the ability to forgive.  This allows us to reach out with compassion to others.  We need to share our testimonies of strength and deliverance.  Hebrews 4:12-13 clears up any miscommunication about the benefits of the Bible:  “For the Word of God is living and active.  Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.  Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight.  Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.”

Beautiful Beloved, being victims of another person’s pain confuses what true, healthy love and behaviors are.  Our worth and value comes from the Lord God Almighty, not anyone else!  This will help us understand why many of us feel unloved and unwanted.  We will do just about everything and anything to fulfill that void.  When others fail to meet our expectations and afflict pain onto our already tattered and fragile lives, we often look outside of ourselves for this very reason. 

God created us with unique qualities that NO ONE BESIDES US has, and without that quality, there would be no beauty in the bunch!  Please do not allow anyone to rob you of your gifts, beauty and talents.  The world needs you!

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!

Blameless Live Laugh Love 1.1

 

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

Blameless Getting Away 1

When You Have Been Abused, Abandoned and Rejected, What Is Next?

Part 1

I’ve been abused, abandoned and rejected.  Now what?  What does that say about me when others treat me as rubbish and waste?  We only discard filth, so does that mean I’m not worthy to be loved, honored and cherished?  Who discards their child with contempt anyways? 

Disclaimer:  This blog series for the next couple months may trigger some Beloveds that have been a victim of abuse.  Abuse and rejection are hard areas to heal.

Who wants to vocalize and admit they’re a victim of abuse, abandonment and rejection?   Not me, but it’s something we need to talk about and share with one another, so…

We all desire to be loved, accepted and belong.  I am no exception.  Admitting I was thrown out as waste and unwanted droppings automatically labeled me as a reject, unwanted, refused, loser, no value, screwed up, refund demanded!  What does that say Blameless Clearance Rack 3about me as a Beloved, my worth and value, and every decision I would make subsequently thereafter? 

When you’re not wanted and abandoned, that rejection tears right through your heart, mind, body and soul.  Plus, you don’t know how to love or be loved; instead you become one whom must perform to others’ expectations in order to be loved.  WRONG!

I’m glad I’m a Beloved who chases after my Lord, even though He never leaves our side.  Otherwise, I truly don’t know how I would have walked through such a lonely, hopeless and heartbreaking journey, much less become the bold and courageous Beloved I am today.  God turned my ashes into beauty.  I know I’m God’s treasured daughter who was once found at the bottom of the dump, but God meticulously cleaned me up and now I’m crowned skipping merrily in freedom, confidence and wholeness.  What a beautiful assurance of His Great Love.  That’s called a beautiful exchange!

As the torturing fire of acknowledgement burns the pit of my stomach as I write, my mouth regurgitates “I’ve been rejected, AGAIN!”  The reality of such an abominable tragedy to any child is overwhelming, but the power from the eruption of St. Tammy’s Emotions exposes an even deeper level of loss and insecurities.

I am so grateful the Lord didn’t consider me scraps that are thrown out to the pigs.  Instead He chooses to love, cherish and relentlessly pursue me so much that He even extended His loving arms down from heaven to protect me when I drove myself off that cliff 37 years ago and redeemed my life with His Great Love.

God doesn’t kick His children to the curb or throw them away like a piece of deplorable regret.  In fact, He calls His children His masterpieces and works of art!  His Love never ceases and He will never forsake us either.  There’s nothing we can do to lose that Love.

When We’re Considered A Piece of Deplorable Regret!

I am not the only person who’s been rejected and abused, much less abandoned.  My heart genuinely grieves for the Beloveds that have been violently tormented.  My teeth grit just thinking about the unconscionable behavior of others.  It’s hell that no one could even begin to understand unless you’ve walked through the valley of the shadow of death yourself. 

Emotional trauma caused by those who profess to love you is the hardest journey to walk through victoriously.  It can cause other mental health issues such as depression, addiction, eating disorders, you name it, just to escape and numb the pain that afflicts the heart and mind.  I know, alcohol makes a great numbing agent, or did!

This is really hard for me to talk about.  Dealing with the tragedies of life and facing it head on is something that is outside of my comfort zone without Mr. Denial, but…

When one is discarded like rubbish, though, this torment leaves a permanent marking from the scorching cauterization of the branding iron.  This imprint of “rejected” forever tarnishes one’s worth and value tragically and effects behaviors regarding life, love and choices and decisions.  Even effects our relationship with God.

God is a God of love and mercy, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love (Psalm 103:8) who never leaves our side.  I’ve been healed by the touch of God and now I understand why I passionately want to help the unlovable because all lives matter and deserve to be loved. 

One thing is absolutely certain besides my tangent:  No one is unlovable and removed from the touch of God!

My bestie lovingly reminded me of the worse offenders to help soothe the sting of my abuser’s manic explosion.  She shared, “Some moms sell their children as sex slaves for rent money and to satisfy their own drug fix.”

We are not the labels our offenders branded us with!

The greatest gift God gives us is family and friendships.  If we’ve been orphaned, God brings us friendships to fill those vacancies and walk alongside of us being the hands and feet of God, along with offering their precious hearts and time.  The love, hope and affirmations we receive from our relationships cultivate our beauty to bloom right where we’re planted.  That’s how we thrive and not just survive.  Investing precious time into our relationships not only shows love, but it also revives honor.

Because we are loved immeasurably more than we could ever imagine, the torturous time feeling invisible and insignificant, you know, overlooked because we are tossed out with the rest of the trash, God sees us.  He not only sees us, He is even proud to be seen with us and calls us the apple of His eye (Zechariah 2:8).  Blameless Crown Tiarra 7To know we are His prized possession and treasured Beloveds should empower us to walk bravely and take risks with confidence knowing He will never leave us. 

When only Love could make a way, being immersed in God’s mercy and love creates a wholeness and contentment of heart.  Knowing we are called His treasured daughters enables us to forgive our offenders.  People are full of pain and pride and sickness.  Shame cripples and shackles.  It’s a powerful membrane.  But we don’t have to stay entangled in the Black Widow’s web of destruction.

Honestly, even though I am at a great place in my life spiritually, professionally and emotionally, admitting that I’m orphaned and not wanted is a hard pill to swallow.  It’s hard to admit that.  It does leave a sense of loss to my heart, but I’ll allow this pain to help others.

Until next time…

Thank You For Being Beautiful You!